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Saturday, February 1, 2020

Cooperative complexities

So, you'd think that the next spanking I'd be writing about would be the 2019 punishment from Marta, right? Well, it turns out Rosa had an issue with me that took precedent. The thing is, this wasn't.......simple. However, I do think it was a good mutual step towards the sort of cooperation I need to accept serious DD in times when it doesn't sit well with me. 

Now I know the purists out there might be getting their "you should just accept whatever she says, no matter what or you're going to undermine her authority" advice ready. Well, those themes certainly came into play but the resolution will never be that simple for me. Here's what happened on Thursday evening:

I suggested to Rosa that we go to one of our favorite stores to get out of the house for a bit, so after a nice dinner we did just that. We found a few inexpensive things and as Rosa was still finishing up her shopping, I decided to try to pull up an app necessary to receive a 25% discount. I thought I was being nice by making sure it was all done beforehand so she wouldn't have to do it. However, the old app for that establishment was no longer working and according to signs posted everywhere, it was necessary to load a new one. Simple right? LOL

Well, as I'm at a side counter trying to do it, a VERY pushy (but probably well-meaning) salesperson began to loudly and aggressively tell me what I needed to do in a very thick and hard-to-understand accent. Now, I don't like to be rushed through things like this and I was not seeking her help, yet she kept jabbering at me and then just flat-out took my phone out of my hands without asking and began to scroll through Safari to pull up the app. 

Well folks, I may be 'out' to a lot of people, but I don't need some saleslady scrolling through my blog list of sites like this one, and Dan's, and others with very revealing names which she could easily see listed. So I took the phone back and told her that I would take care of it myself. I didn't get nasty with her although I was fuming at the fact that she just snatched my phone out of my hand without asking.

I found the app with her still loudly telling me what to do in some barely-understandable semblance of English. But the app was not working for me and I began to get frustrated just as Rosa joined me. Already annoyed, I told her that a new app had to be loaded but I couldn't get it to work. Rosa tried on her own phone with the saleslady still jabbering at us both now. To shorten this a bit, Rosa got hers to work and then wanted to load mine, but .....and don't laugh....at this point I am in a crowd of about 4 or 5 people and the lentils I had as a side dish for dinner have put me in a very uncomfortable situation. 

So, already irritated, and now bloated, I just said that since Rosa's app was working, we could do mine at home and that could we just GO? Rosa did not know of my situation and continued to work on the app as I'm standing there ready to explode from both ends! So now I loudly said, "it's not working and we can do this later. Let's use your phone and just GO!"

When we got to the parking lot I was able to let off the abundance of pent-up lentil-gas before getting in the car, only now Rosa is telling me that she didn't like the way I was acting in the store and that I embarrassed her. She then said that she intended to spank me when we got home. Well, I couldn't believe what I was hearing. After trying to deal with everything described in the best way possible and under the worst of conditions, I let Rosa in on ALL of the factors that went into my reactions......and it didn't seem to matter to her. She still thought I should be punished.

Well, if I had gone along with her at that point I would have probably died of an aneurysm in mid-punishment ......but rather than sulk or fight I tried to see her point. She wasn't upset with anything else I did except my raised voice which she said made her look to others like some abused spouse. I told her that I said nothing about her and that NOTHING was directed at her, and that if I had I'd be more than willing to pay for it. She added that my resistance ran contrary to my promise to obey her, but I countered that I had an idea: would she be willing to POSTPONE the punishment just ONE DAY, so that I could try to refocus on her issue and get the image of the annoying saleslady out of my head? I said that even though I wasn't being nasty to her, that since she HAD brought up this issue of my loud voice embarrassing her even when what I was ranting over had NOTHING to do with her before, I would accept punishment for it on that basis. But NOT right then. I needed some time.

And rather than push the issue, or feel she had lost her authority and give up completely, she just thought on it and said, "OK". True to our mutual pact, we both cooperated the next night as disciplinarian and miscreant .....and I got one hell of a spanking out of the deal...long and hard. BUT, while it hurt, I was not resentful over it, and found it oddly reinforcing of our roles. So, we cooperated and as a result, she maintained her authority.....though with a delay, and I got my punishment, but in a mindset that allowed me to feel sorry rather than angry. And now we're both very happy with ourselves ......AND each other!


10 comments:

  1. Life in the real DD world--as opposed to the one the "you should just accept whatever she says, no matter what or you're going to undermine her authority" crowd live in--is complicated, isn't it?

    It sounds like you both ultimately came to a very wise compromise. I commented on your comment about this on my blog, but now that I understand the context, I probably would have reacted the same way you did while in the store. Though, I kind of get the line she was drawing. I probably would have been fairly nasty to someone taking a phone out of my hands without permission. Very rude, and pretty much an open invitation to reciprocal rudeness. But, in that same situation, I probably would have done exactly what you did and gotten very short with my wife. I have a major problem with impatience, especially if I feel like something is causing others waiting in line to be inconvenienced. I probably would have gotten very terse if my wife was holding up a line to try to get an app to work on my phone when her own was working. In fact, I know I would have gotten vert testy in that same circumstance. Even without the lentils! And, if I directed that testiness to her, once I had time to think about it I probably would see it as being spankable, but I would also still think that she should have stopped messing with my damn phone so we could get out of the store.

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    1. LOL, see? we're not so different.....lentils notwithstanding.

      Also, we were at a side counter, not a check-out line, so there was no one waiting behind us, just other people looking at the stuff in the cases we were using as a table. My impatience was mostly gas-driven at that point. And I wasn't even rude to the woman who grabbed the phone....though I was pretty upset at her.

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    2. Got it. I probably would have been rude. Sounds like she was asking for it.

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  2. When it rains it pours. at my age I'm hard of hearing and mix that with someone who has not bothered to learn our language, along with problems within my body would put me over the edge. the only thing i feel you did wrong is you should have told Rosa you were having a problem maybe whisper it to her. but the way it turned out Rosa rightly felt you needed spanking. and after some thought you did too. in the end everything turned out great. Now one more spanking to go.
    archedone

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    1. Thanks for the input. (BTW I have mild hearing loss along with tinnitus...which is a relatively recent complication.) But the good thing is that we did discuss the heck out of it all before proceeding....and that, along with the one day pause....made all the difference.

      And since we are going to Marta & Wally's tonight for a small Super Bowl gathering, Rosa is probably going to give me half of the 500 Marta recommended.....so she can tell her what happened. It'll give them something to wink and giggle over during the game since neither are really into football.

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    2. I'm sure Marta will enjoy hearing everything about how Rosa spanked you. 250 should leave you a little tender depending on how hard she spanks you. but I'm sure it's the little details Marta want to here, like getting you ready for spanking positioning, applying the implement. they will both have a good time with it. by the way it's the day after the super bowl and what a great game. KC did a great job.
      archedone

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    3. Oh well. It was not to be. A friend who was also going to the party dropped by early and rendered our plans moot. And while Marta is a willing and playful participant, her personality is way too shy to want to know such detail.

      It was a good game.I very rarely overeat....but I did yesterday and my stomach is a mess today.

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  3. That phone incident - some stranger grabbing my phone (or anything) out of my hands - would not have gone over well with me either. And I'll venture to say you were more gentlemanly than I might have been in that circumstance.

    But here's a cool thing. That photo you put in the story...Once when we were visiting, I was spanked in THAT room by Dana, who it is a photo of, and it was a memorable one.

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    1. I was too flabbergasted to even react. Besides it was obvious this was just a cultural cluelessness moment for her and not really overt rudeness. But that in conjunction with the yammering and non-functioning link was a bad combination.

      Cool information on the photo.

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