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Sunday, August 9, 2020

Spanking captions

 A while ago, a series of captioned images at Dan's blog inspired an idea for me to take the notion of random photos adorned with often very specific spanking comments to its logical.....or illogical......limits. My beef with certain types of kinky captions is neither secret nor recent. I have gone on derisive tirades countless times as many here know all too well. But this time, I've decided to illustrate my feelings with some spanking captions of my very own making. 

To start things off, let's begin with a very standard example of what is seen ad nauseam on the internet. Often it begins with  someone taking an innocent image from the public domain like this one:

....And adding a completely prurient spanking caption like this one (which I did even as I kind of threw up in my mouth a bit).....

Utterly absurd! 

But it occurred to me that if a model in an office setting, looking like she's going over the month's figures, can be viewed as a prime candidate for the kinky self-indulgence of notions no doubt far removed from whatever this young lady was actually thinking or saying, then why stop here? If a professional woman with the right look and pose is fair game for fantasy-fodder, then why limit it to the office?

At least as believable as the the former image.

And why stop there? Dominance is not limited to the professional elite. So why not depict some spanking captions with an array of women from all around this great, big, diverse world?

Now here we go with a nice dose of reality. And she looks like she could do one helluva job too!  So how come I never see any spanking captions like this?

Why can't a spanking caption candidate be discovered at the local Walmart? 

And why are the typical spanking captions all geared to a certain age group? Don't spankers age like the rest of us?

Go get him, Granny!

The other thing, besides age, is that often the models chosen depict stern or aloof women with a bit of edge and attitude. But women are human like the rest of us. I'm sure not every dominant female is a paragon of self-discipline and virtue. So what about a different dose of potential dominant reality?

Not a bad looking lass. And don't be too hard on her. She's probably had a difficult day and your underwear on the floor just sent her over the edge......and to the liquor cabinet. No glass needed.

We all know that DD doesn't always live up to the fantasy. Let's see some captions that reflect that!

OK, OK, so perhaps you are saying that for the whole disciplinary authority thing to work, you kind of need to have a more virtuous example in order to inspire respect and admiration. I can see that. So let's explore that road:

How can you top this for Tops?

Now another issue that I have often complained about was that in the usual spanking caption the model rarely looks like what she's saying is anywhere close to what the photo seems to indicate. Often the image looks like a catalog ad for a sweater, dress, or what-have-you. But these images have been defended with the rationale that I really don't know for sure that the person would not be into whatever she is saying and that even if she isn't, it's not important. Well, let's see.

Hmmmmmm, "young"-----check, "sexy" -----check, "the right expression" -------also check. Yep, this should work just fine for just about anyone.

And how about this one?

OK, so you can't see her face, but.....her pose seems stern. And.....how do you know she is NOT thinking of spanking her drake later on that day?

So, I think we have opened up the world of possibility quite admirably and with ample justification. (You're all welcome. My pleasure.) And so now that everyone's mind has been expanded within the realm of spanking captions, let's just finish out the post with a cornucopia of dominant ladies all eager to put you across their laps:

From ancient history.


To more contemporary history.


And even from current events.

From twisted thoughts of childhood.


To Fellini-esque nightmares.


And even out into nature itself. It's all good.

And if it's "all good" then it is ALL good.......right? So let's see some creativity out there! Enough with teens at their backyard graduation parties talking about spanking. Enough with celebrities. Enough with the catalog models! Let's see the whole face of dominance and authority on display. Average people, even ugly people, the young, old, ethnic, etc. And don't stop there. Let's see captioned fairies, unicorns, butterflies, realtors, the homeless, and even the person who tries to get you to agree to solar panels over the phone. I'm sure ALL these people are avid spankers just waiting for a chance to have their kinky voice heard. Their voices should not be denied.......especially since it's just really us putting our words in their mouths.


















12 comments:

  1. KD, you are simply hilarious! I don't have quite the aversion to captions that you do, and in fact like them quite a lot since they often imply a whole scene. At the same time, I do much prefer that at least the person in the picture looks like they knew they were making a spanking picture. So a girl on a beach holding a racquet of some sort or a woman sitting in front of her mirror holding a hairbrush just doesn't quite get there for me.

    -ZM

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    1. Thank you, kind sir, but in all honesty, I find the ACTUAL ones I see just as hysterical. All I did was think of how removed from reality I find the ones currently flooding the internet and then just took them, what is for me, a very small step further.

      Delete
  2. I was just thinking about the captions thing when I opened your Blog. I have to admit I was cogitating more about how it's just as invasive as many other of the egregious things that crop up on the social media. In my mind appropriating someone's image like that borders on the mentality the underlies misogyny and other horrible social ills. And the response to complaints like that are always "aw, it's just good fun. It's harmless." Yeah unless it's your wife, daughter, sister, or mom.

    And your examples were indeed halarious and exempt from my wrath in that they were legitimate satire.

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    1. Thank you, Tomy. I do recall that you were one of the few respected members of our community to actually side with me on this issue. But now it seems we have some more folks in agreement with us. (Not that that will ever stop it.)

      Delete
  3. Hilarious parodies KD and well deserved.
    I share your distain for the constant barrage of ridiculous 'spanking' caption photos we have to endure every day!
    They are absolutely ridiculous and meaningless.

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    1. Thank you very much, Glen. I actually wanted to use an advertisement photo from a tampon ad but couldn't find one that worked. I also seriously considered a public domain image of a woman standing alongside a guy in a casket and have it read. "Just like you to do anything to get out of a spanking!" but felt maybe that was too much. LOL

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    2. Sounds like a great epitaph to me KD!

      Delete
  4. No way I can come up with anything pithy or interesting on this many pics, though I definitely agree you hit your mark where *illogic* is concerned. LoL. A few comments on specific pictures:

    #2: Totally stealing this one for the next time I do a topic about either lists or happy DD wives!

    #4: Am I being elitist if I question whether they are really golfers? Also, are you insinuating real country people don't do DD spanking? I beg to differ. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=lnQr1jilN-k

    #5: Isn't she a better example of someone who really, really needs to be a spankee, not a spanker?

    #6: Seems like blatant age-ism on your part to suggest any incongruity here. Some of aren't as prejudiced at assume old women can't be kinky spankos. https://disciplinedhubbies.blogspot.com/2020/03/no-post-this-week_0.html

    #7 and #8: Now, these raise an actually serious issue for me. You and Tomy have opined that there is something really, really bad about spanking captions because the subject might be someone's little girl, girlfriend, wife, etc. So, posting a picture of some falling down drunk chick isn't offensive to her or her daddy, but putting a spanking caption on it is? It's kind of like posting pics of really, really young naked girls. There are more than a few examples on this blog of young naked girls. Like "likely Jeff Epstein dating targets" kind of young. And, some of them don't seem staged but more like stuff someone pulled off social media and distributed or used for revenge porn. But, THOSE pics of barely legal naked girls wouldn't be at ALL embarrassing to their future selves or their offended daddies, but add a spanking caption and now it's just sooooo invasive and wrong!

    #9: For most spanking pictures or drawings to work, there does have to be something either stern or authoritative about the disciplinary subject. Mary doesn't really have that. Would have worked better with a nun.

    #10: I don't really know what to do with this one. You clearly see something in her expression that I don't, though maybe you're reading something into them because you like 'em young. See comments on #7 and 8. LOL!

    #11: Hmm. What makes you think that's a she under there?

    #12: Another one I'm likely to steal in the future.

    #14: If that conversation *hasn't* happened in the Conway household, I really doubt it is from lack of desire on Kelly Ann's part.



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    1. Hey there, I think there is a misunderstanding of my point on more than a few of these, but let's go in order....

      >>>>>#2: Totally stealing this one for the next time I do a topic about either lists or happy DD wives!<<<<<

      That doesn't surprise me and i even had a feeling you were going to say that if not actually do it.

      >>>>>>#4: Am I being elitist if I question whether they are really golfers? Also, are you insinuating real country people don't do DD spanking? I beg to differ.<<<<<<<<<<

      Ah, here is example one. The poibt of posting these as I thought I stated was that there SHOULD be captions like this out there and yet I've never seen them. In fact, I think it proves my point that you seem interested in using the sample caption I made, but not this one. So, is it me or you that doesn't think folks like this should be represented?

      >>>>>>#5: Isn't she a better example of someone who really, really needs to be a spankee, not a spanker?<<<<<<<

      Perhaps, but to the point of existing captions.....it doesn't matter. According to those defending captions, all that matters is that I as captioner WANT to portray her as a spanker. Hence the other images in this post.


      >>>>>>>#6: Seems like blatant age-ism on your part to suggest any incongruity here. Some of aren't as prejudiced at assume old women can't be kinky spankos. <<<<<<

      Exactly the same point as #4. My feeling and what I wrote was that there SHOULD be images like this.....but there aren't.....and again, you use captions. Why didn't you want to borrow this one?

      >>>>>>>#7 and #8: Now, these raise an actually serious issue for me. You and Tomy have opined that there is something really, really bad about spanking captions because the subject might be someone's little girl, girlfriend, wife, etc. So, posting a picture of some falling down drunk chick isn't offensive to her or her daddy, but putting a spanking caption on it is? It's kind of like posting pics of really, really young naked girls. There are more than a few examples on this blog of young naked girls. Like "likely Jeff Epstein dating targets" kind of young. And, some of them don't seem staged but more like stuff someone pulled off social media and distributed or used for revenge porn. But, THOSE pics of barely legal naked girls wouldn't be at ALL embarrassing to their future selves or their offended daddies, but add a spanking caption and now it's just sooooo invasive and wrong!<<<<<<<<

      In using an image the person who uses it is only taking what is already there. I didn't photograph these people secretly and post them as intentional embarrassments. They embarrassed themselves. A captioner is saying much more about the subject than the image itself reveals......often for their own prurient interest. Big difference.

      And I do post youthful nudes. Guilty as charged. But again, unlike Jeffrey I'm not dating them or enticing them to pose for me or hook up with me. I'm just looking at what they themselves posed for. And I happen to like the beauty of youthful bodies.....along with others. Hell I don't even jerk off to them......because I am not allowed to masturbate. ;-)

      >>>>>>#9: For most spanking pictures or drawings to work, there does have to be something either stern or authoritative about the disciplinary subject. Mary doesn't really have that. Would have worked better with a nun.<<<<<

      A nun would have been predictable. Mary was just what I wanted to prove my point. To use your own argument....how do you KNOW Mary wouldn't be into spanking? ;-)

      continued......

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    2. >>>>>#10: I don't really know what to do with this one. You clearly see something in her expression that I don't, though maybe you're reading something into them because you like 'em young. See comments on #7 and 8. LOL!<<<<<

      Again.....doesn't matter. Are you saying young clowns don't spank? How judgmental! ;-)

      >>>>#11: Hmm. What makes you think that's a she under there?<<<<<

      How do you know there isn't? (Boy I really do enjoy using your own caption defense to defend my own! The irony is .....ironic.) ;-)

      >>>>#12: Another one I'm likely to steal in the future.<<<<<<

      You are welcome to it. Just hope there is no curse on using the image for spanking purposes.

      >>>>>#14: If that conversation *hasn't* happened in the Conway household, I really doubt it is from lack of desire on Kelly Ann's part.<<<<<<

      I think I could use the thought of being spanked by Kelly Anne as a surefire way to stave off an orgasm during a long tease.

      Delete
  5. I'm at a loss for the right words. But "hopeless" is the best one I can come up with.

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  6. These are amazing and encompass a very diverse female "spankers" as you put it.
    It's a coincidence that I was just looking at Max Ernst's The Blessed Virgin Chastises the Infant Jesus Before Three Witnesses.. the other day, trying to find how it was perceived in the "conservative era" of the 1920's, and then coming to read your post today.
    Also, regarding Mrs. Conway, I have an "unhealthy" fascination with women in politics (both with whom I agree or disagree). For once, I think addressing them as ma'am carry much more weight than the civilized, almost patronizing use of the word addressing "laywomen" with no-much power at their hands...

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