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Friday, February 12, 2021

H & H

No, not 'happy & healthy' ...........horny & helpless! That's how I feel today.

I'm not locked, but that hardly matters. I feel just like this guy anyway.

Readers here well know that being horny is not something I can just freely and easily deal with. But I do have options, and unfortunately those options are currently embedded in a dilemma of sorts. Here are the circumstances:

1: for one reason or another (though none being any problem with Rosa) it has simply been a fairly long time since my last 'O'. Like REALLY long. That's not an indication of any problem but just a simple fact. So me being horny right now is  quite  understandable. ( I would wager that very few of you are in anything close to a similar situation.) LOL

Again more how I feel rather than any accurate depiction of it. Now there's a variation on a 'blow'-job that I can relate to. 

2: I currently have a post on hold explaining the spanking/disciplinary situation here over the last few weeks. I don't want to steal the thunder of the post itself, but please know it is NOT a post bemoaning a LACK of OTK-time. However, I am waiting for the completion of one last disciplinary spanking, now overdue, in order to publish the post. There have been several others.

Despite a lack of posts on the topic, there HAVE been quite a few spankings going on over here.....with one more hard one still due.

3: Based on the prior sessions, this is not going to be an easy punishment installment and I would prefer to not have it follow an 'O'.....which would make it worse.

4: Rosa is working in the next room. I technically could ask for an O, but I don't want to because of the pending spanking. And I suppose I could ask for the last spanking, but since it is a real punishment, and it's her issue, the timing for it IS really up to her. And she has had circumstantial reasons for postponing it this long.....and by 'long' I mean probably a week.

A rare shot of handing over the hairbrush. Asking for it is never easy and sometimes not really appropriate.

5: As per #4, I could just ask for a tease, which would be something ......and that is something she'd probably consent to in a heartbeat. But a TEASE? Really? The way I'm feeling now? I'm genuinely afraid I'd have an accident......and that would be the worst outcome.

It wouldn't take a lot of this to produce an unwelcome outcome.

Obviously my dilemma is clear and fairly unfixable. The ideal resolution would be for the weekend to provide an opportunity for the last spanking, and then I could ask later for an 'O'. I HOPE that is what happens and I might drop hints to encourage such a resolution, but I can't control the wild card factors. 

If I got that O, there'd no doubt be a bit of this to go along with it.

Or maybe this?

As such, I am currently dealing with the reality of being a chaste male sub in a DD relationship. Those who question how such a lifestyle plays out in real life can ponder this situation of mine and maybe get an idea of what a 24/7 agreement means at times. Sure, sometimes it's sexy as hell, and other times it's just flat-out frustrating. 

I'm not complaining. This is just the life I've chosen and every choice has its consequences. And Rosa fully believes that her control over these twin areas of behavioral accountability and orgasm regulation are to my benefit, even as she knows that adhering to these conditions isn't always easy for me. (She has told me so.) And she's probably not wrong. She rarely is. 

Like Rosa, I find it hard to believe she means that.

So here I am, just like I said at the start of this post: horny and helpless. But hey, maybe it "character-building"? LOL

She looks a little horny and helpless too.

(edited to include something that really happened just as I was finishing this: Ana my Monster texted me just as I was writing to ask about my day, and since she IS my Monster, I jokingly told her an abridged version about what I was writing and what my 'situation' was. To be clear, she is well aware of this additional aspect of her mother's control and has frequently endorsed it as something good for me, so I was hardly surprised by her response? All in caps: "SO STOP BEING YOU AND JUST SUCK IT UP AND GET IT DONE AND BE IN A LOT OF FRUSTRATION."  I laughed and we soon said our 'see you later's and I told her to enjoy her day...and she playfully concluded: "you too"......"or try to"........"not really". LOL What a devil!)




17 comments:

  1. As you know, there is some discussion going on right now on my blog on whether DD spankings are inherently sexual, intimate, etc. A topic I've thought about exploring is whether DD and punishment spankings can sometimes *reduce* the amount of sex we get. Like you, there have been times that I've not initiated sex, because it was temporally linked in some way to a spanking. In your case, it is wanting to avoid having an O prior to a spanking, because the post-orgasm spanking would be worse. I haven't done that, but there have been times when I knew I had a spanking coming and knew that if I asked for sex, she would insist on giving me a spanking first and, therefore, I didn't ask.

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    1. Yes, this is pretty much an issue of pragmatism that folks in our shoes seem to understand. A punishment spanking from Rosa when she is upset and determined as she is in this case needs no augmentation to be effective, nor will my current state sexualize it......it will only make it a little more endurable.

      I don't even think my request for an eventual O will be associated with it....unlike some who seem to like to have sex after a spanking. Instead it will come some time after, perhaps hours or even a day later.

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  2. Well, I couldn't think of a more worthy recipient of some quality spanking time. ;-)

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    1. Stay tuned for the post on the actual issue....which is probably different than yours. Most who weighed in on what Rosa was upset about agreed, and that will be the theme of that post.

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  3. That’s my niece. She pulls no punches .Suck it up sweetie.

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    1. LOL, True all around. I'm managing.....what else can I do? I don't really have much choice. ;-)

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  4. quick question for now....... does Rosa read your blog?

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    1. No, never. She loves that I have this blog, and often likes to hear about what I'm doing, and she'll even contribute her opinions towards topics, but she is funny about all of you. She thinks everyone on the internet is "fake". She kind of thinks Dan might be real LOL, but she just has no faith in this medium. We have argued this endlessly but there's no overcoming her reluctance.

      And if you are asking because of Ana, please understand that it was Rosa who first decided to include her kids into knowing what we were doing and then empowering her daughter with "secondary" authority. To this day and for years prior, if Ana recommends a punishment and asks that it be done on her behalf, Rosa has NEVER refused. That is the level of trust between them. But then you would have to meet Ana to understand. She is simply one of those people in life who are objectively exceptional. She is currently in her second year of Dental school after finishing college on a full scholarship (academic not need-based) after coming here as an immigrant from Peru and barely speaking English. Our life is weird on one level....until you meet us all. Then it all seems to make sense and fit perfectly.

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    2. nope my question had nothing to do with Ana (hell my eldest daughter knows all about my life choice - (but that's another story)

      I was asking because of your angst about to ask or not to ask....

      I wish you satisfaction in all things this weekend... and look forward to hearing all about it :)

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    3. oh hell and I forgot to say
      I totally agree with Rosa about mistrusting those on line - been burnt a few times by 'pretender's and players...

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    4. I've been burnt too, but learned from it. I think over the years my instincts have served me well .....most of the time, though nothing is definite.

      The angst over 'asking' is a come-and-go thing. My "situation" though has overcome any reluctance and I asked her about the punishment this morning. She is going to do it today. As for the O, I may wait until tomorrow to ask. But you never know. I just don't feel right asking for one too soon after a punishment. If this was a play spanking of course that would not be a factor.

      Hopefully by Sunday evening I'll be a little more 'balanced' frustration-wise.... even if maybe a little tender in the seat. ;-)

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  5. I understand, AND I'm snickering. Blame the Sadist in me.

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    1. I'd expect no less a reaction from you, dear.

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  6. I'm sure this post wasn't meant to garner sympathy, so you'll not get any from me. I'm also pretty certain it's not a complaint, so you'll get no platitudes either. As you said, it is what it is, and well, made the bed, lying in it. I wish you the quickest passing of time so that the spanking will be dealt with and then after that you can get the O you hope to be given permission for. All the best KD.

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    1. Thanks, dear. I think you characterized the post accurately and the best possible resolution. In the past I have written about being restricted sexually and I think some don't see how it plays out in real life, perhaps assuming it's always sexy torment, or always some cruel denial. This admission was just meant to show that sometimes it's something else.....a reality to be accepted even when an O is truly desired. So for you all, I hope it illustrated that in an amusing enough way.

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  7. Well KD don't know what you did to deserve a punishment spanking but since it is happening it should be a memorable one,I was told I have one tonight as well. The ones I am warned about are usually the best/worst ones. There will certainly be some hot action tomorrow as well. Hope you are pleased with the outcome.

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    1. I will be posting about it all on Tuesday or Wednesday. So far everything has been going quite nicely over here. Have a great weekend!

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