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Saturday, July 29, 2017

A Proxy Once More

I don't look very feminine and I am not 'into' cross-dressing per se......but recently I tried to be a convincing proxy for a female friend of ours that Rosa was frustrated with. 

A few days ago I ended up in another proxy situation. But this time it wasn’t for Ana or anyone else in the household. Instead I became a proxy for a casual friend with whom Rosa also works, that I shall call ‘Lilith’.  And I did so without even the satisfaction of her being aware …...and thereby possibly being appreciative of my sacrifice. Now Lilith is very nice…...which is why we are friends. She has a good heart. But, she has a few traits, expressed mostly at work, that drive Rosa crazy. On several occasions recently, the once humorous vents from my Honey have taken on a colder and angrier tone.  However, one day while texting Rosa, she admitted that she was ready to kill Lilith and that her day was turning sour.

I have seen my Honey get like this and the last thing I wanted was for my time with her to be ruined over these pent-up feelings towards this other person. I had a thought and I just texted it out to Rosa: “I hereby agree to be her proxy. Keep track of all the stuff that annoys you and use it for when you have me over your lap later..>wink emoji< >heart emoji< >kiss emoji< “

Her reply? A succinct, “OK”.

And that’s what we did. As the day progressed I had a few ideas of my own to enhance Rosa’s ‘therapy’.....while also attempting to ensure that my experience remained appropriately punitive and not playful. As a willing proxy, that is one of my caveats, and one that Rosa fully understands and agrees with. If the punishment being given out is well deserved, then to be effective, it can’t turn into a role-play. Instead, I have to agree to basically ‘become’ the actual miscreant and take what they have coming to them no matter who it is. And for me to separate the act of being a proxy from other ‘over the lap’ experiences, I also need to feel I am getting what the other person deserves.

When we finally got to the event itself, I stripped and told Rosa of my first thought: in order to appear more Lilith-like, I would wear a pair of the most feminine and frilly pouch panties we own. They are bright pink and have a sheer lace flap barely covering the otherwise thonged rear. Once on, my male parts were totally hidden while a mere flick of that flimsy flap would completely bare my cheeks for punishment.  Lilith is very much into appearances and ‘girl-stuff’ and this just seemed a perfect symbolic connection to her. Rosa liked the touch. 

These are exactly the pouch panties we used. The billowy rear drape has this way of making my rear seem MORE vulnerable than when I wear something that is just open......and besides, it gets flipped up before the spanking starts anyway!

Thus attired I then listened to Rosa vent about Lilith for close to half an hour. She really needed to unload her feelings verbally, and since she went on for much longer than I expected, I became utterly convinced that she was taking this very seriously. The longer she went on, and the more annoying instances she brought up, the more I knew that this was not going to be pleasant. But eventually Rosa said all she needed to and suggested we get on with the punishment.

Before going over her lap I had two more things to add. The first was something that I don’t personally enjoy at all but made perfect sense for the situation on a couple of levels: I offered to use our special bar of ‘mouth soap’ as a sort of gag to bite down on during the spanking. 

When we first came up with the idea of mouth soap as an enhancement to certain speech-based offences, I refitted a box of Dove soap with some tongue-in-cheek labels....

....and even some 'instructions'........

........on the back of the box.

I have only had this done as a punishment a couple of times but we keep the bar handy as a reminder and threat. Since most of Lilith’s offences stem from what comes out of her mouth, it seemed perfect. I also wanted to again try to not be ‘me’ and thought that the soap would prevent me from making any noises that would sound like I was being spanked, thereby furthering the illusion that Lilith was Rosa’s target.

Finally, though I didn’t really need to say it, just for the sake of assurance of my consent, I told my Honey that I was ready to do this. I think I said something like, “OK Honey, I am going over your lap as Lilith, not me, and I don’t expect this to be fun. So just assume this is her and do what you need to in order to get this out of your system.” Then I got into position, told Rosa I was ready, inserted the soap bar as I felt Rosa flip up the little lace panty-flap, and waited.

Well, Rosa must have really needed this as an outlet! She became totally focused on me as Lilith and punished me enthusiastically. The spanks came in hard flurries as if Rosa was thinking about separate things and then punishing each one separately. It went on for a while and I had no illusions of being the subject of a playful romp. My butt got a thorough roasting as soapy drool dribbled onto a towel I had under me. If the spanking itself wasn’t punitive enough, then the soap certainly drained any possible enjoyment from the situation. I felt doubly chastised as my teeth bit into the yucky bar with each emphatic salvo. Eventually I was told to get up and quickly removed the soap and rinsed the foul taste from my mouth as best as I could. My butt was swollen and leathery.

Afterwards Rosa admitted that the session helped, but that she could see possibly needing another dose if things kept going the way they had been. I told her I would be there for her (or Lilith depending how you want to look at it). 

Recently we had Marta over and Rosa told her about the proxy session, and about how it was genuinely therapeutic for her. She even teased Marta that she could use me as a proxy if she ever had any anger issues with people she could not actually spank, saying it could be just as therapeutic for her! Marta seemed intrigued at the prospect.....and who am I to disagree?


  1. This has got to be a first cousin to Psychodrama; a theraputic method for dealing with emotional stresses of all kinds, past and present.

    1. I would not argue that point. I think what makes it work for us is a combination of Rosa's ability to transfer her focus from the fact that it is technically me on her lap to picturing the person for whom I am proxy coupled with my sincere assurance that I fully expect a genuine punishment in their place. I think while one could argue that this is still a role play, it just doesn't feel that way for either of us.

      Thanks for the link too!

    2. You know about that mental process we use to enjoy movies, books, theater, etc, called willing suspension of disbelief?

      "Poet Samuel Taylor Coleridge coined the term “suspension of disbelief” in 1817, but almost two centuries would lapse before we could infer how the brain might support this puzzling phenomenon. Coleridge asked readers of his fantastical poems, including The Rime of the Ancient Mariner, to give him “that willing suspension of disbelief for the moment, which constitutes poetic faith.” That phrase, “poetic faith,” encapsulates what our brain is doing. It isn't that we stop disbelieving—it's that we believe two inconsistent things. We accept that we are sitting and reading or watching a movie. We also believe or, more accurately, feel that what we are reading or viewing is happening.

      Norman N. Holland, author of Literature and the Brain

    3. Thank you for that enlightening exploration of 'suspension of disbelief'. It is an interesting aspect of the human experience. Without it, most of our enriching experiences would fall flat. Personally I'm a big proponent of it.

    4. I have a different topic from Proxy that I would like to explore. But not sure how to start a new string. It's basically about request spankings. But with a different twist.

    5. E-mail it to me and maybe I can make it a blog post topic?

  2. One potential issue I'd see with the proxy approach -- does it make it less likely for the person giving the spanking to actually deal with the behavior of the actual offender in some way that might solve the actual problem?

    1. That is an excellent point. I think that other than having been Ana's proxy during the "open closet/light left on" period, the Lilith episode, and the way Rosa invited Marta to use it, all centered around people who for one reason or another could NOT be confronted in the way the frustrated party might wish. Neither would the 'guilty party' be aware that someone they knew and liked was being punished in their place. Instead all the proxy offer allows for is the emotional release...... even if, and maybe precisely BECAUSE, the issue itself might not be able to be resolved.

      With Ana it was different. Ana KNEW I was her proxy and to ensure knowing her mistake was going to negatively affect someone she cared about, she actually had to sign and acknowledge the Discipline Slip for each instance. Since she was not doing the offending behavior intentionally and precisely because the punishment wasn't an excuse for 'playtime' between me and her Mom, but rather a genuinely unpleasant punishment, she did try to NOT repeat the behavior.

      But to the point of resolution, I did suggest that once the anger was released (into my bottom LOL) that perhaps Rosa would be in a better frame of mind to confront Lilith on the annoying behaviors. As of yet, this has not happened.....but I am hopeful. Otherwise, even while I am willing to substitute for Lilith again, without resolution I think their friendship could be doomed.

      In Marta's case.....should she decide to use would certainly for people she would never confront directly, and therefore be just a pressure release for her.

      Good question!

  3. I was rather amused by the picture of the couple above. If you remove the chest tattoo, he could easily pass as Shilo.

    1. They are (or were) a real life DD couple who once had a blog and made videos, the most popular of which was called "Bros not Hoes". You can Google it and still find it, but they have long since given up on the blog. I think her name is Twilight.

    2. Shilo told me as well. Thank you for attaching a name.

  4. Even as proxy, your butt gets so much attention! You lil devil! ;) haha

    1. Uh huh......and you never once complained whenever I was YOUR proxy! LOL Even when it meant getting thoroughly roasted for something you did. ;-)