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Tuesday, July 17, 2018

RED, White, & Blue

Today I'm going to take a little break from dares and talk about something that is just making me simultaneously sick and gleeful: yesterday's Trump/Putin press conference.

On one hand, hearing a president side with a proven, hostile, foreign power over his own country makes me want to vomit. But every cloud has a silver lining, and this one certainly does for me. 

I grew up constantly hearing arch-conservatives rail against anything even remotely "communist". "BETTER DEAD THAN RED". Remember?  But now all that has apparently changed. Your daddies were all wrong! The loyal 30% who support Trump in everything he says and does, and who for decades decried communism and Russia as the epitome of anti-Americanism are now forced to swallow all that apparent nonsense and happily kneel alongside their orange-haired boy for a nice long slurp of Russian ass.......from taint to tailbone. (I hope it goes down like broken glass.) And just to complete the image for me......could y'all please sing "Proud to be an American" between licks? (and  be sure to tell us later exactly what Russian ass tastes like? caviar? borscht? treason? )

And after "y'all" capture that nice Russian-ass flavor in your Duck Dynasty beards, you can hop back into those big 'ol 4x4 sporting not only one of these:

......but one of these:  

......right alongside, so you dump the Coors lite out of your coolers and replace it with some nice vodka, and go fishin' with your comrades.  I suppose I can see how you good ol' boys got confused since the flag your daddies hated looked like this: 

.....and the new one waving on your Chevy is good ol' "red, white, & blue".......just like Trump and you. But it's all good. Your man knows what he's doing, right? He's a 'stable genius' after all. And he's there for YOU. He is Making America Great  strong communist at a time.  LOL.  And maybe when all this is over, you guys can solve the age old question:

'How many licks does it take to get to the center of a Russian conspiracy?'

Putin is all bent over and waiting, so go to it. Your president is ready and eager. Are you?


  1. I'm not American but I follow your political scene closely and have done so for a number of years. I agree with you. Your current prezzie is he worst fuck-up ever and, regardless of what he wants people to believe, the only "great" the rest of the world sees when they look at America now is a "great disaster" waiting to happen. The conservatives are like little children after they've broken something and don't want mummy and pappy to find out,so they keep dancing around the room pointing out different areas for their parents to look. Anywhere but where the disaster is. The countdown has started. Apathy and overconfidence by the Democrats and their supporters caused this as much as the ignorance and bigotry of the other side. Best of luck in the upcoming elections.

    1. First off...... LOVE your name! Hysterical.

      Second, thanks for your comment. This situation is a bit scary, but I hope people start to wake up to the obvious on both sides. The other thing is we as a country have been through other periods where there was deep division....and not only during the 1860s.

  2. Superb commentary. I would cry if you did not have me laughing so!

    1. Thanks, MrBill. This one came very easily.

  3. Crimson Kid (C.K.)July 25, 2018 at 7:57 PM

    Apparently 'Von Trump' was correct when he boasted that he could shoot someone on Fifth Avenue in broad daylight, yet his hard-core base would still support him.

    The one thing missing from his 'ass-kissing' performance on Vladimir Putin's butt was a closed-up black umbrella, just like Neville Chamberlain carried back in 1938... --C.K.

    1. Hey, C.K. I didn't notice your comment at first. (Blogger is doing this thing now where if you allow anonymous commenters, they won't send you notices on new comments even if they aren't anonymous) Anyway.....yeah, his supporters are an interesting bunch.