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Wednesday, August 8, 2018

Daytime TV

I don't watch much TV. We don't even have cable or satellite, the only thing we pay for is Netflix. So my only exposure to the typical fare I suppose most Americans enjoy is when I am in a hospital or doctor's waiting room. (Which is where I was this morning.)

Now I don't understand why people who are not feeling well to begin with and are probably a little nervous about their visit, need to be subjected to Kelly Ripa or Rachel Ray? It seems unnecessarily cruel. I even wonder if these places get some sort of kick-back from these shows? Why else are they always on EVERYWHERE you go?

I can't see that open mouth without wanting to stuff a live grenade in it.

Years ago, when my mother was sick and I'd bring her for her radiation treatments, there was Kelly and Rachel. Now, years later, they are still on......along with their vapid squealing audiences. UGH!

Rachel, how did you ever get a cooking show.....and keep it?

The pervasiveness of these shows, along with shows for when your appointments are later in the day and include things like "The View" or "Ellen" (which are almost as bad) is rampant. It doesn't matter whether it's a doctor, a dentist, a lab place, or even the waiting room at Pep boys, there they are. Do people really like this shit? It seems they must.

For me though, after a few minutes of hearing their annoying voices, and their catch phrases, and the insipid drivel they end up discussing, I am so wound up and full of anxiety that even if I felt fine BEFORE seeing my doctor, I go into the exam room craving a Xanax.

But maybe I'm too much of a snob when it comes to things "pop culture-like"? Maybe I should relax and give in to my baser instincts like generations do now and have done before? And so in that vein, since I think  that historically the most popular form of low-brow entertainment for the masses used to be the gladiatorial games in the Roman Coliseum, I have a proposal:

If I have to be subjected to Kelly Ripa and Rachel Ray, can they at least be engaged in bloody combat? It doesn't have to be old-fashioned with swords and spears. In fact I think chainsaws would be an excellent choice of weapons for our modern age. Maybe if that was on TV, I wouldn't mind so much. I tend to think these ladies might actually seem less grating if they were fighting for their lives. And even if I'm wrong, they wouldn't be annoying for long.


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