My bottom is discolored and tender even as I sit here writing this post. Earlier I got so concerned over this evening that I began to wonder how I would manage it. And then I had an idea. It would not be something that would make things easier on my sore hinder, but rather enable Rosa to deliver the last installment without me wriggling all over the place. I texted my Honey a while go and asked if she thought it would be good to use the bed-top spanking rack we keep under our bed for our last installment. She texted back affirmatively and so it is now ready and waiting for our use later.
This is the rack set to a higher elevation than it is currently set for.
Normally we use this rack for hard switchings with a synthetic cane-like switch we own. As such I am usually secured in a fairly bent position. That will not be a good idea for a paddling though, so I have set the device to its lowest least angled position.
As a result of knowing I'll be secured, I feel oddly calmer. I know the device will not save me. In fact it will ensure my cooperation even if my body gets the urge to resist, but 'I" don't want to resist and as such, feel the device will allow me to just let what is going to happen anyway, happen in a way that frees me from concerns over my own involuntary reactions. (I also plan to use a bite-down gag of some kind as well so I can just react freely to what comes without trying to be braver or more stoic about it than I currently believe I can manage.) So, I know this is going to hurt a LOT....but now I don't need to strain beyond my capabilities to accept the punishment I am willing to endure. It's an odd trade-off but perhaps one that a fellow DD practitioner would understand.