KDP:-We have just discussed some of the more serious aspects, let’s now explore some of the ‘fun’ ones.........How much of the ‘pain aspect’ do you see as practically necessary for the activity to be effective, and how much do you just find fun?
Nickki: I don’t see it as PAIN anymore. In the beginning, yes, but now I see it as a loving gesture of chastising my friend, or paying my friend. Your butt needs to be red to be effective. PAIN is a wasted emotion.
KDP:- -Give us your feelings about the appeal of the following situations and tell us which situation you like best:
--a straight up ‘payment’ for some chore.. Nickki: I love the payment for chores. It is my appreciation payment
KDP:--a rule is found to be broken ... Nickki: Rules are harder because I have to release my pain completely in order to stop paddling you and sometimes I hold on.
KDP:--I did or said something to genuinely piss you off .... Nickki: Pissing me off is happening now..... answering these damn paragraphs! I had to go to the library to help decipher them, And you are not George Stephanopoulos.
KDP:--You have spanked me in front of Rosa and Jean, (though not both at the same time [yet, lol]) and in private. Does having another person around change your approach or enjoyment in any way? Which do you prefer and why?
Nickki: Yes, having someone in the room changes the dynamics because they aren’t where we are. I am completely comfortable with telling you as I spank what a bad boy you are, but I would be uncomfortable doing it in front of my wife or your wife. So I can spank, but no animation will occur if they are there.
KDP:--Lap versus a stack of pillows. Both methods are usually used by you in the same session. What are your thoughts on each?
Nickki: Both methods are used by me and I like both. Over the lap is comfortable for soothing you as ‘my boy’ as I paddle you. Your roles change. You are ‘K’ when over pillows and you are 'my little boy' when over my lap. It’s calming to me to finish with a lap paddling.
KDP:--Speaking of versus, you said you liked my ‘rock/paper/scissors’ analogy where I said we're in an arrangement where we are in the permanent roles of Nickki =paddle & KD=butt …...and paddle always beats butt. I have admitted this is a powerful reality for me, what are your thoughts?
Nickki: Yes, my role is large in this arrangement. I do have power....... just like this interview IS unbelievable. Your questions are stated within a 60 word paragraph and there are 25 paragraphs! I want to beat the hell out of you for this! But this is who you are!! I have a charming personality obviously for you to even trust me to be part of this. You obviously feel safe with me and this is why we are here at this moment.
KDP:--The experience of spankers could not be more opposite than that of the person being spanked. Spankers are in complete control, see everything going on…..(the kicks, the clenching, & jiggling cheeks turning red), and other than tired arms are fairly safe from pain. Those being spanked have limited control (mostly just prior input over the issue or safety issues at the time of the spanking), only see what’s in front of them, and end up with a sore, tingling bottom. As the spanker, what unique insights could you share about what it’s like to be the one swinging the paddle? What do you enjoy about being in your role?
Nickki: Yes, my arm does get tired and that is the only pain I suffer from the spanking. The perks are set from the onset of the relationship. You are bottom and I am always a Top. My paddling you for payment or discipline is a given I have the control. If you want more you must ask. If I hit too hard you must tell me. I am the deliverer. I am butch, hear me roar!!
KDP:--Another huge difference between roles is ‘pride vs. embarrassment’. Someone in a dominant role can often feel pretty smug about having the power to declare a spanking is in order, possibly even bragging a bit to others. Even if the submissive party is content and comfortable in their role, they really aren’t in a position to be smug about it. If anything the person who gets spanked is usually embarrassed to openly admit it. Everyone I’ve discussed this with…..even my own mother…...admitted this is an inescapable fact. What are your own thoughts about this “proud to be the spanker/embarrassed to be the one spanked” dichotomy?
Nickki: In the beginning I didn’t tell anyone. I was embarrassed big time…...one for doing it to you, two for seeing your bottom half, and three, seeing my friend Rosa, knowing what I had done. It helped you talking to me more and more about it until I came to the ‘payment plan’. That works for me so well. And then I do want to please you because you pleased us, me and Jean, with the love and quality of your work you do for us. You save us from calling the plumber, electrician, and candlestick maker. I told a few select people…..two in my office (men) and made a mistake in telling my father who was not pleased. But the most important person is my own and my comfortability….because it won’t happen if I’m not comfortable. And yes, I’m proud to be the spanker.
KDP:--I have already told you about my feelings of admiration for those like you, Rosa, Jean, and others who have the confidence, determination, and guiltless ability to take charge, expect obedience, and spank hard when they choose to. But “Tops” can only BE Tops if they have individuals like me who submit to them. You have seen me submit to orders to bare my bottom, position myself to your liking, endure your smacks, and follow your rules. While this is expected behavior for someone in my position, I can assure you it’s not always easy. What would you say to me or other submissives out there to reassure us that our submission is appreciated?
Nickki: It is an honor to work out an arrangement like this. It helps to clear the air in an old-fashioned way. While the old-fashioned way has been demoralized to being abuse, it is nice to know there’s that good old-fashioned whoopin’ taking place somewhere. We applaud our submissives for your endurance of old-fashioned values.
KDP:--You have gone from someone with limited experience to a rather accomplished disciplinarian. I remember that you were a little intimidated by my experience level versus yours, but that no longer seems to be an issue. What have you learned about giving an effective spanking and what advice would you give to someone starting out?
Nickki: An effective spanking is based on my discretion. My level of emotions at the time of the spanking. I am the giver and I control the level and amount. Do what you are comfortable with as a beginner and let the recipient’s punishment guide your level of intensity because they are being spanked for a reason……..whether it’s punishment, love, or reward.