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Tuesday, October 26, 2021

Did you hear the one about.....?

My guess is if you're talking about recently, probably not. I personally can't remember the last time someone told me a joke. I don't mean hearing a stand-up routine, or someone sharing a meme, I'm talking about a straight-up, old-fashioned, well-told tale from a regular person that ended with a punchline that made me laugh. 


The sad thing is that given our current life environment, of polarized politics, Covid-19, global warming, etc. etc., we probably could use a good joke now more than ever. And yet? silence.

"I'm having a shitty day. Tell me a joke."

This is not to say there isn't a constant stream of shared humor going on. Today's 'joke-telling' seems to have been replaced with 'meme-sharing'. And there's nothing wrong with that. Some of them are very witty......though, just like a corny or bad joke.......many are pretty lame as well. But that's how it goes. One person's knee-slapper is another's groaner. 

Call me 'old-fashioned' but while I enjoy a clever meme, I miss a well-told joke, and personally, seeing how texting and social media has thwarted actual human interaction, I see an increasing inability in people being able to provide their own entertainment, instead relying on sharing what others have done.  It's sad.

In my case, there could be several reasons my joke well has run dry. I am retired and no longer have access to that 'water-cooler' environment of the workplace. My current friends, and even my wife, are not gregarious raconteurs. A lot of my interaction IS online, so the substitution of meme for joke is to be expected. And perhaps, "PC  culture" has finally driven the nail into amateur joke-telling?

In the article here (LINK) from 2019, some comedians debate whether PC Culture has or has not affected comedy, and it's an interesting debate with opinions on both sides. But even still, the pressure on a professional comedian for consequences is not the same as the guy in a work, or nowadays even a social, environment. Could it be that people are just too gun shy to risk it?

Perhaps the reason for my lament is that I not only grew up in a time when joke-telling was pervasive, but I personally always felt that the ability to tell a joke in a social situation was a kind of social grace to be cultivated. As a father I sort of insisted that my kids learn at least ONE good joke and practice it until they could tell it well. For me, this was like learning how to order from a menu and how to properly tip. Naturally, if one was so inclined, they could amass a collection of jokes, and perhaps refine their various accents, like a good actor, to be able to deliver ethnic dialog convincingly. It is like the person who can attend a party and sit at the hosts' piano and play for the crowd.....an enviable talent that was cultivated in people for a long time. 

What happened to us? 

--------------------------
It would be hypocritical of me to write a post like this and not offer a joke to my readers. The following is one of my favorites and is an excellent example of  naughty but relatively clean humor that requires human interaction. The joke requires dialog with changing accents, and depends on gesture as well.......neither things easily conveyed in a meme and even here will require your imagination. It is an ethnic tale, but not one that disparages that ethnicity. The specificity of  the protagonist merely lends flavor......in this case, Italian flavor no different than the basil and parmigiana cheese on his Sunday pasta. 

There was this Italian widower who was getting on in years and whose daughter was becoming increasingly concerned for him. But, he being stubbornly independent, the best she could do to keep an eye on him was have him over every Sunday for dinner. 

One Sunday he arrived for dinner and immediately the daughter noticed a black eye. "Poppa! What happened to your eye?"

(in heavy Italian accent and miming what he describes with exaggerated hand gestures) "Oh, you wouldn't believe! I'm a innocent. I go to a church like I always a do, and I want to sit in the front pew but it's full, so I sit in the next one and whenna da priest comes in, we all stand up, and I see that the lady in front a me, she hazza her dress stuck in her ass. So, I try to be nice and I pulla it out for her. Annna she hits me! I tell ya I don't know why she was a so mad, I just tryin' to help."

"Oh Poppa, you are always getting into trouble. I told you, you should stay with me so I can keep an eye on you."

But the old man insisted on keeping his independence and not being a burden and said not to worry and he'd be back every week for dinner. And as promised, he comes the following Sunday and THIS time his OTHER eye is blackened.

"OH poppa!" the daughter cries. "What happened THIS time?!"

"Oh you a not gonna believe! I'm a innocent. Today I go back to a da church, but again the front pew is full and I gotta sit in the next one. And AGAIN I notice the same lady from last week she is sittin in fronna me. The priest comes in and a we alla stand up. And AGAIN she has her dress stuck in her ass. But I don't a do nothin! The guy next to me, HE pulls it out!!!! Well, I know she a no like that, so I putta it back. (gesturing with an upturned hand hastily tucking a dress into a buttcrack.)





Friday, October 22, 2021

The Hard Way- Part 4 of 5

The Hard Way- Part 4 of 5: In which the ghoul demonstrates some techniques she picked up from Vlad Tepes.

Now being fully determined to prevent my newfound enthusiasm from waning, the ghoul ordered me up, and I could see she was now holding a rather sturdy femur, though it could not have been hers, since both were still attached to her pelvis. “Come here,” she barked, “and turn around!” 

I did as directed when she issued one further command: “Bend over, dear…….and let me see what you’re hiding between those little cheeks. Hmmmmm, not exactly a tight, virgin pucker, eh? Well that’s good. It’ll make this next part a little easier. Now take a nice deep breath.”

I imagine a specter such as she, must have access to all sorts of metaphysical aids and while I can’t say for sure, I imagine she must have conjured some ghostly ectoplasm onto the femur’s head and greater trochanter, to act as lubricant. 

This was a mixed blessing because while I could have never accommodated such a gnarly intruder without some slimy assistance, I found the ectoplasm to not only possess the slickness of Astroglide, but the apparent Scoville equivalent of a ghost pepper, (apropos of a dead specter I suppose)The ghoul wasted little time in plunging that knobby shaft directly into my waiting anus…….

…….. and I could not tell whether the burning sensation I felt was from the ectoplasm or the forceful insertion.


My tormentor was certainly more swift than gentle, driving that bone right up inside me..

 Once impaled and looking like a ham with the bone still in.............


…... I resumed my podal ministrations with a zeal that would be the envy of a martyred saint…... or Trump supporter. 

Sensing my profound willingness to please, the ghoul forced her foot as far into my mouth as it could go so that I was now impaled by bone as deeply in one end as I was in the other, though at least her toes did not produce the fiery torment that the femur did. My bottom felt as if a glowing hot poker had been lodged inside me rather than a bone.


The ghoul then laughed maniacally at her total victory over me, her mortal toy. And I? I was as defeated and compliant as any sub with a fleshier, and less deceased Mistress. “OK, my little foot boy. I think we’ve taken that aspect of devotion as far as we can, and my time is growing short as well. As much as I’d love to torment you all day…..or all eternity for that matter…...there simply are other places I need to be. But before I go, there IS definitely one last thing you and I are going to share.”

“But FIRST…….” she exclaimed, “we need to rid you of your little motivational intruder. And besides,” she mused with a tilt of her skull, “I have to get that back to its owner before her morning jog.” 

Once again I was summoned to the ghoul’s side and ordered to turn around so that she could get a good grip on the sturdy bone jutting out of my posterior. She took hold of it and tugged, but the trouble with most long bones is that they are rather prominently flared and bulbous at each end, and a femur is emphatically so.

This is great when your desire is to have it stay in, but becomes a nuisance when the goal is removal. For someone dead for so long, you would think she would have learned patience, but this ghoul had little and rather than ease the bone out gently, she just put her foot against my rump and yanked it out with a shocking ‘pop’, like a champagne cork, leaving my anus akin to Johnny Cash’s “Ring of Fire”. 

I was then ordered to clean up quickly and return.

------------------------------------

'The Hard Way' concludes next Friday with Part 5 of 5.


Thursday, October 21, 2021

Here, piggy-piggy

As mentioned in the warrior doll post, I also made a creepy pig. The funny thing is how we ended up getting it. While camping the weather was initially drizzly and once we set up camp, we decided that rather than just sit under a canopy for hours on end, we should maybe pick up a few things from a local market and look around the area.

While out, we saw a kind of antique store/flea market combo and Rosa suggested we give it a look. While there, we saw a cute porcelain pig doll in a country dress and it seemed like Rosa wanted it. When the price was quoted as $10, we both frowned a bit, and Rosa kept walking, but the lady there quickly amended her quote to just $5. To me this seemed MORE than fair, and I asked Rosa what she thought, and she said, "get it."

At the time I thought she wanted it. But much later when I asked her what she wanted me to do with it, she said, to make it into a Halloween thing and added that she naturally thought that's what I wanted it for. So after some discussion we realized that she said to get it because she didn't want to disappoint me, and I offered it to her because I didn't want her not to have it if she wanted it. A misunderstanding, but a kind of nice one. LOL

So here we are now with a cute little piggy that neither of us really wanted and I just figured it would be a fairly easy conversion to something a bit more disturbing. This shot is one I found online of the exact same porcelain pig doll head and body in a slightly different dress than ours:


And this is what I did with ours:

I used Miliput to extend the mouth into jowls capable of housing those tusks and also added the austere brows. The tusks were carved out of some white plastic rod, and I re-used the white underskirt from the same broken doll I got to make the Zuni-guy's hair from, cut it, and sewed it (myself......with some struggle LOL) into the blood-stained apron. The cleaver is an old cheese knife I had with a different doll, but which looks much better with Piggy. After that, it was just a matter of a quick repaint into less cheerful colors.

She now sits on the same mantlepiece that displays my Halloween "kid's toy shelf"....the same one that the nasty monkey sits on. I didn't really need another doll for that shelf, but looking at how it turned out......for $5 and very quick work, I'm glad we got her. I wonder though, how the woman who reduced the price for us would feel about this makeover? 

Annnnnnd........for those who prefer their piggies neither innocent NOR demonic, kindly try "Three Piggies" (LINK) (if you haven't already, or just want to read it again.) It's an illustrated "children's story" for kinky adults in which several of my favorite kinks all play some part in a kind of 'love contest', and although it's not in any way a Halloween story, you might find it fun.






Tuesday, October 19, 2021

"Aiy-yai-yai-yai-yai!"

If you're my age or older, the 70's were not just some nostalgic decade to be played for laughs on TV by Ashton Kutcher and Topher Grace, but an actual time to live through. And if you managed it, you did so without a cellphone and a plethora of streaming networks. If you wanted to watch something, you could go to a movie theater, or turn on your TV. And if you were young.......you did both a lot!

Being a creepy kid (not an exaggeration, my Kindergarten teacher actually spoke with my parents over my apparent obsession with monsters and such) I was quite familiar with shows like: The Addams Family, The Munsters, Dark Shadows, Twilight Zone, Outer Limits, Night Gallery, Alfred Hitchcock Presents..., One Step Beyond, and movie showcases like Chiller Theater and Creature Features. You even knew when the "4:30 Movie" was going to run a weeklong feature of giant monsters, or creepy stuff after school.

If you were into scary shit as a kid, you HAVE to have this short claymation intro, featuring its characteristic six-fingered hand and ominous....."Chilllllll-lllllerrrrrrrrrr" voiceover, etched into your sick little brain! 

And if you were a little more obsessive, you might have even managed to discover Zacherle hidden away on some channel somewhere.

John Zacherle: "Goodnight, whatever you are!"

If any of this sounds like you, you probably remember a day back in 1975, (or perhaps later as a re-run, because it certainly was shown more than once) when a little made-for-TV anthology, featuring stories penned by Richard Matheson, (who wrote extensively for Twilight Zone, Outer Limits, and Night Gallery,) and featuring Karen Black playing different roles in three separate tales, made its debut. It was called, "Trilogy of Terror". (LINK) And odds are, if you remember it, you probably remember one particular story best. The last one. The one with the little warrior doll. 

Now, in the movie there is a glaring error. The doll is referred to as a Zuni Warrior Fetish Doll...........and not fetish in the way which would suggest he went around spanking people.........from................wait for it........Africa. Well, there IS a Zuni tribe. And there IS even an Africa. BUT, never has that twain met. The Zuni people were a tribe of Pueblan Native Americans.  So..............let's ignore that and just say that this evil little fucker is from  some other tribe in Africa.

Anyway, let's get to where this is going. Recently this movie has been featured on Amazon Prime, and for some nostalgic shits & giggles I watched it with Rosa, who also remembered the movie from a much later showing, since she wasn't even BORN in 1975. LOL.  Afterwards, I thought how cool it would be to have a replica of that doll on my Halloween table and figured that SOMEONE must have produced such a thing. And.....one quick internet search later......I found them. 

And here he is.....In all his bandana-clad glory. 

One thing that follows me like a curse, is the almost freakish consistency with which whatever quirky thing that becomes a kind of desire for me, is either unattainable............or comes with a price tag that exceeds my budget. Happens ALL the time. (Try getting a bottle of Suze now.) Anyway, yes, you can get little Mr. Pseudo-Zuni here from various sources............as long as you're willing to drop somewhere between $300 to $450 or so to have him. I was not. BUT that didn't mean I no longer wanted him.

So.................................scrounging through my old action-figure fodder, and dragging out my leftover Sculpey clay and Miliput...........I just made my own:

He's perhaps not 100% alike, but to be honest, neither is the commercial one 100% to the movie prop. But, it's close enough for my tastes. But......."oh, shit! His charm fell off!!!! Honey! Hide the knives and preheat the oven....quickly!"

The good news is I spent around $3 to make him, having had everything I needed besides the hair (which was the hardest part of the whole project, BTW) and the base he's on. The final irony is that I had kind of promised myself that I wasn't going to make anything new for Halloween this year. And.....not only did I make this guy, but also a piggy-doll I will feature in a later post. 












Saturday, October 16, 2021

Back to school

We are now three installments into "The Hard Way" and it should be obvious by now that besides being a bit of a sick, self-indulgent exhibitionist, willing to pervert any Halloween decor, I also have quite a collection of props. I also like skeletons, and as you will eventually see, not just human ones. But what you WON'T see are these bony, plastic offerings, currently available in most Halloween shops:


And to fully explain why, I will provide a kind of pictorial, educational rant directed at not only the manufacturers of these items, but anyone out there who buys them, so..................
"Listen up! School is now in session."

"What creature is being represented in the first slide?"
"An octopus?"
"Yes, an octopus!"

"And what class of animals are octopi?"
" 'Second class', sir?"
"NO! >SMACK!< Cephalopods!"

"And do cephalopods have skeletons?"
"I.......I......I guess so...."
>SLAP<
"NO! They DON'T! That's why they are cephalopods and not vertebrates! So....octopi DON'T HAVE SKELETONS!"

"Now let's talk about the second creature being shown. In which of the nine major phyla would spiders fall under?"
"Um, phyla? Isn't that pastry dough?"
>SLAP!<

"That answer was so stupid, I had no choice but to prevent you from saying anything potentially dumber. Now, pay attention! Spiders are arthropods, which means their external bodies, the ones we see, ARE their skeletons. That's why we call it an exoskeleton!"
>SWIP!-SWIP!_SWIP!<

"Now why would someone make a spider with an internal skeleton when they already have a perfectly good external one? Kind of redundant, wouldn't you say? So....why do it?"
>SMACK!<
"Ummm, ohhhhh, um.......to make money, Ma'am?"
"Correct answer, but a terrible reason, so...."
>SMACK!!!!!!<

"And you three, why would you BUY such erroneous garbage?"
"OW! 'Cause it's Halloween, Ma'am?"
"There are all sorts of other skeletons out there.............. even if they did give them ears which are technically incorrect, but which do help identify the animal being represented, and therefore is somewhat forgivable......because it IS Halloween. Why not just content yourself with THOSE, and not advertise your ignorance with these ridiculous abominations?"
"OWIE-OW-OW.....We're sorry, Ma'am!" 

"Apology accepted. Now let me just make sure your remember today's lesson in the future."

End of an 'old school' lesson.


























Friday, October 15, 2021

The Hard Way- Part 3 of 5

The Hard Way- Part 3 of 5- In which KDP is threatened with the unkindest cut of all.

--------------------------------------

Looking for further ways to both torture and motivate me, the first thing my tormentor saw nearby was the mantlepiece of creepy dolls and toys.


Seeing the mechanical, musical monkey, she waved her hand and the thing sprung to life chattering like the Zuni warrior doll in “Trilogy of Terror”. As it scurried beneath me, the ghoul once again gripped my genitals and dangled my most sensitive parts, like an old coin purse to a thief, to attract the monkey’s attention. 

Intrigued by the tempting offer, the monkey opened his cymbals wide and waited for the signal from its mistress. 

She then cackled fitfully, amused at the prospect of my monkey-mashed testicles, and chortled, “go ahead evil monkey, let’s see what you can do.”  She held me firm so I could not escape my impending fate but waited savoring the apprehension in my face. It reminded me of when Rosa slaps me down there and will wait with a cocked hand as I grimace in anticipation. The monkey seemed equally amused by my worried expression and seemed to savor the moment, but then did as commanded and slammed its cymbals together just as the ghoul cautiously pulled her fingers away from the monkey’s target area. 

The impact resounded not with a clang, but a ‘splitch’ and a loud cry from me far less musical than even the worst wailing from Shakira. The knee-weakening ache that followed reached deep into my stomach almost making me nauseous. The worst part was that the evil little bugger didn’t even let go but held me clamped as if in a vise, squashed between his steel saucers.


Now much more sympathetic to women and their mammograms, I tried pulling him off in a panic but the creature possessed the adhesion of a tick imbued with demonic strength. Anyone who complains about having ‘a monkey on their back’ never realized there are far worse places to have one.  

“Feeling a little desperate?” the ghoul asked sarcastically. “Fair enough. Let him go, little monkey, and back on your shelf. I see something else that I think will really let my message sink in.”  Her attention was now focused on my shelf of specimens in jars and as she walked over with me in tow, her feet clacking with each step on my wooden floor, it occurred to me that skeletons would be natural tap dancers.


“Hmmmm, oh, now here’s an idea! I wonder how your severed penis would look in one of those jars? What a conversation piece for a Halloween Party! And  we wouldn’t even need a terribly large one, would we?” Seeing a particular specimen, she continued, “ah here we are! A worm! How appropriate. This container would be just right I think. Come with me!”


The next Halloween prop she snatched up made me nostalgic for the pincers, as she lifted some rusty shears from the table of props.


 “Now,” she growled, “you have a….choice!”


I did not need her to explain further. My alternatives could not have been more clear than they were. “You don’t have much down there to begin with, my reluctant friend, so I doubt you’d like to end up even smaller than you are.” She was right. I had little to spare in this area and her method of trimming me further struck me as even less appealing than kissing those wretched toes. I pleaded for another chance, and the ghoul tossed the shears aside.

I was as true to my word as I could have been and this time imagined it was my honey, Rosa's feet…...though it took an enormous amount of concentration to do so since there was no comparison between those lovely “mushrooms” of Rosa’s and the calcified phalanges of the ghoul.. 


The ghoul sensed the change in my enthusiasm. She now moaned with pleasure at my lappings, and then chuckled evilly to herself, as if some terrible idea had just filtered into the void of her cranium. “You know,” she began, “you are definitely doing a much better job. I wonder though, since each act of convincing you to try harder only influenced you for a brief, scary, or painful moment, maybe you would be even better if you had a more constant reminder acting to motivate you?”


-------------to be continued next Friday with part 4 of 5.


Thursday, October 14, 2021

MY M/m


A rare example of an M/m photo where the recipient is potentially older than the disciplinarian.

Several posts back, a certain cartoon series had been an increasing source of thought about some rarely explored areas of my own inclinations. In it a male is spanked by another male, among other things, but in this post, I am going to limit myself to just that one thin sliver. 

That "troublesome" cartoon.

A few facts: 1: I am male (OK maybe not the most macho example, but I have the parts….even if they don’t work), 2: I am unwaveringly straight in my orientation. As I mentioned in a previous post: very GAY-friendly and open, but hopelessly straight to a point that even when my mind is open, my body runs screaming. 3: I am kinky and a good part of my interests revolve around spanking though obviously people here know not exclusively. 

All that said, one would think that perhaps other than my father back in my childhood, I have never been spanked by a man. And…...that assumption would be incorrect. In fact, I have been spanked by two, but they were very exceptional and nonsexual situations. But other than these unusual exceptions, I don’t find myself actively thinking about such things. I simply like women WAY too much!

Now along comes this cartoon, and I am drawn to it and I found myself trying to figure that out. So I imagined an ‘anything goes’ set of circumstances, situations, and people, however likely or unlikely, and asked myself: would I be interested in getting a spanking  from a guy in any set of circumstances and if so from whom?

The initial answer was pretty dismal for a seemingly adventurous kinkster like me. I simply could not initially think of anyone I knew that would lead to any such willingness. But the fact that the drawing situation touched something in me made me think harder. And then?  I thought of someone: a guy I’ll refer to as Hernan, who is a neighbor friend of ours. Now when a sub guy usually fantasizes about being spanked by another guy, often it’s in the context of cuckolding and the spanker is visualized as an Alpha Male type. (Just visit QBuzz’s blog and you’ll see countless examples.) Well Hernan is anything but a macho alpha, being instead a very flamboyant Gay male with a wicked sense of humor. His partner John, however, is a more burly type who easily passes for straight in his characteristic Giants sweats. And I like John a lot, but if I’m going to bend over for a good whacking it’s going to be for Hernan. 

Why? Well, I am not at all willing to submit to a guy who is thinking he’s somehow better or more dominant than me. It might be true, but I don’t care, that scenario is a sure-fire failure from the get-go. But put me in a situation with someone not macho at all, but mischievous as hell, with just the right touch of situational dominance, and throw in a playful rather than sexual rationale for it all, add some witnesses who would make the situation funnier, and you finally have a M/m situation that I would go along with.

I even went so far as to picture how such an unlikely thing could possibly happen with Hernan. Rosa and I have been to their house several times, and Hernan loves to tease me with Gay sexual innuendo, and likes that rather than freak out or be upset, I’ll play right back. So, imagine if you will, a little dinner party. The four of us are chatting and our lifestyle comes up. Those familiar here know this is not something far-fetched. LOL. So say  Rosa, who will unashamedly admit to anyone interested that she spanks me, confirms this fact to Hernan and John, and let’s say Hernan has a bit of interest. I doubt he does because I think I would have picked up on it by now, but let’s just say he responds in his characteristic and dramatic teasing way, and with his raised eyebrows says some Spanish expletive and then warns that if that’s the case maybe he should see how I’d handle a spanking from him. That’s all it would take. And in that scenario, I would most certainly submit to whatever he had in mind. There would be no sex, no secrecy, just possibly me either bent over  or if he preferred, OTK, getting my butt paddled with whatever implement could be rustled up. Hell if everyone was serious and wanted this to happen I could see Rosa sending me home (½ block away) to get her paddle)  And.....double-hell..... I'd even be willing to get it from him on a bare butt! And? I’d find it fun………….. even if I ended up unable to sit the rest of the evening. And Rosa?................. would tease me mercilessly. 

This is the best I can do to illustrate my Hernan-scenario, but thinking of Hernan in a Harley-Davidson shirt is ludicrous. Also you'd need to adorn that exposed wrist with a lot more jewelry! Otherwise? Passable. The thing I like about this shot is that it takes place in a kitchen and seems very casual...........even while the color in those beaten cheeks clearly indicate that the spanking itself is no mere game of party-dare patty-cakes.

And that’s another bit of irony. Given this scenario, I would actually find it funnier if instead of handling it like a joke, he took the opportunity to really let me have it in front of our respective spouses. Instead of resenting it, I’d be impressed if he could have me all kicking and desperate rather than it being some token pit-a-pat thing.

Now this is a VERY narrow scenario! And that’s kind of my point in how limited my “OK Zone” is with this idea. In researching images for this post, I pored over tons of Gay spanking images and found NONE that fit my preferences. The closest I could get were pictures with enough ambiguity so as to allow me or a viewer to pretend the circumstances were closer to my quirky conditions. The typical Gay spanking scene is not unlike straight ones, with Tops of whatever gender fitting the stereotype of the older, wiser, tougher, Dominant, and the sub being either younger, or smaller, or at least more profoundly submissive in personality. 

Legal-but-youthful.............and clearly in charge........if not in focus.

OK, so now with Hernan’s scenario behind us, who else?  With no one else I know as a candidate, I  asked myself, “OK, so what set of circumstances would I need to accept a spanking from a male I perhaps don’t know or know only casually?” Well once imagination comes into play, even the narrowest of conditions suddenly become possible. And while still pretty limited, here are a few brief scenarios I came up with:

Scenario 1: I am talking with Rosa, and she tells me that in sharing one of our adventures with some male co-worker, he expressed an interest in seeing her in action. She asks me if I’d be ok with it and after finding out some stuff about the guy, agree. Ideally he too would be Gay, though it’s not mandatory. (Though the problem with this “straight” speculation is that I can’t imagine too many straight guys wanting to spank another guy anyway.) Anyway, he witnesses our interaction, is intrigued, and asks Rosa if he can have a turn? Depending on the situation and his personality, I would go along with it. The key here is I trust Rosa, and if she felt this would be a good idea, well…...I’d do it. If she refused, the question would be moot. 



Scenario 2: Somehow at some get-together, it comes out that I am pretty liberal and prone to taking crazy risks in games and stuff, and someone much younger than me, but curious, suggests some spank-oriented dare. (Again, I can’t picture a straight guy wanting to do this, and my key factor is that for this to work the desire to spank me has to be present in the potential candidate. Whoever it is, he’s got to want to do this more than me.) So…..the game is chosen, the stakes set, we play and I lose, and the result is I am now obligated to be spanked by this guy. What works for me here is that: it’s a game and therefore playful, the guy in question wants to spank me for whatever reason, the dynamic is a bit of a reversal because in this scenario the instigator is maybe mid-20’s or so, and there are witnesses to watch the whole thing play out.

Not a perfect illustration for my scenario, but close enough to get the point across. Imagine the other players being of mixed genders, and all adults rather than what appear to be teens.

 ( A variation on this is that it’s a birthday party, someone wants to do birthday whacks, the person with the birthday is unwilling, and someone who knows me well, like Ana or Rosa, offers me as their proxy, and again there’s a male guest there who wants to take advantage of this turn of events.)

Scenario 3: Here’s the last very narrow and strange scenario, and the ONLY one that involves a burly straight male: My Nickki tells a male friend of hers about our adventures, and he being straight and suspicious, tells her that I couldn’t possibly be doing this stuff with her for anything other than a deeply sexual reason. She assures him this is not the case, saying it’s playful and adult-sexy, but not sexual. He persists and says “if that’s true then ask him if I can be present for one of his punishments from you and that I do it for you myself?”  Confident of her position, she agrees and asks me if I’d oblige. Now in this scenario my motive is entirely different from the others. Here I don’t want this guy to spank me  but am willing to endure it to show my obedience to my “boss”.  Ideally  the resulting spanking would be tough to take, but I submit to it to prove my sincerity, especially since this would ostensibly be a punishment for something I actually DID to upset Nikki.

Here we need to imagine the victim being as old as I am, and Nickki looking on with a smirk.

In looking back on all of these scenarios, there are a few consistent, rigid conditions:

The guy in question is trusted by Rosa or Nickki, or perhaps even Ana or Marta. He is usually not very Alpha, but could be in the last scenario, and is more likely to be younger or flamboyantly Gay. There is no sexual aspect like him being nude or shirtless, or asking for some submissive sexual act as proof of my defeat. There is no implication of cuckolding or sexual service. Instead, the atmosphere is playful....a game of sorts. And in each and every situation there are witnesses present. Not one of my imagined scenarios occurs in private between just me and the guy in question. 

Now I don’t know what this means or says about me, my proclivities, my views on the diverse world of spanking, or whatever. But these are honest revelations. And believe me I had to really ponder them to even realize they were in me. 

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Remember.................tomorrow is Friday! Another installment of "The Hard Way" will be posted in the morning!