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Thursday, May 27, 2021

"New" car

Well, after much hesitation, fate intervened and kicked my overly-cautious ass into action, resulting in a long-overdue car purchase. It's a long, sad story. You know I occasionally like to ramble and rant, and other times just fire off some bullets, well today it's bullets:

-Though happy with my Santa Fe, it had seen better days. The most upsetting thing was a hit-and-run that bashed in the front left fender WHILE I WAS OUT IN NYC WITH MY FAMILY. I WASN'T EVEN HOME! I tried to fix it myself but decided to just get a new car and save the deductible.

- A couple of years later when I had saved up the money for a new car, Osito, my stepson, promptly totaled his mother's relatively new car. My money went to getting her a replacement for a car that would likely not have needed replacing in several more years. 

-Financial situations did not develop as I would have liked: hence I decided to live with my old one for a bit longer.

-Then the air conditioner went.

-Then the hydraulics on the rear hatch went and I had to use a pole to hold it open.

-The tires eventually wore down.

-All throughout I just waited for finances to improve, and they did. Not precisely to my liking, but to a more "breathing room" degree.

-Still hesitating for things to get even better, Ana, on her recent visit home noticed a hairline crack in the windshield even as I realized the car was about a week overdue for inspection. It would never pass with a cracked windshield, and I was loathe to replace it.

-Rosa intervenes and just says, "the windshield is a sign, KD. It's time! You've been miserable driving the other around for YEARS now. Get yourself a car. You may not be rich, but you're not poor, but you treat yourself like a poor person!"

-One more financial fell into place with the refi, and off I went! I scored a "certified pre-owned" with every feature I wanted and none that I didn't, AND it was "pre-owned" with 7000 miles on it! (More like a new car if you ask me, but with all of the pre-owned perks and price tag!)

- This is not it, but it looks just like it:

So.......I have a "new" car!

I still have a lot to do before it rains tomorrow, so some of the more 'fun' and adult posts will have to wait. But I feel bad leaving the more prurient among you without anything, so here's some gratuitous car-related nudity!

Do those come 'standard'?

And THAT'S how she learned to drive a stick.

And is it me or does it look like that guy is all turned around and his dick is on backwards? I think he draped his shirt over his lap, but boy does it create a weird illusion!

Plenty of cargo room. (I meant the car, not her hoo-hoo.)

Life is funny, so just lay back and enjoy the ride. (The guy in the next car is certainly enjoying it.)

Monday, May 24, 2021

Icebreaker punishment


This will be just a quick update to say that this weekend provided enough privacy and opportunity to get around to a punishment due for some verbal attitude I displayed while power-washing our siding and soffits last weekend. 

It wasn't a horrific punishment, but it was real enough.......... and kind of overdue in general. Rosa and I discussed a return to more regular discipline (something it seems is a natural part of the cycle of DD for couples with stuff going on.) and this spanking served the dual purpose of dealing with a particular issue while acting as a symbolic return to more accountability.

Interestingly enough, Rosa declared quite emphatically that her observation of my mood and behavior indicated it was also time for an O. As you all recall it's been a while since my last, and in-between there was a LOT of teasing without release. 

She wasn't wrong, and at some point after my spanking, with all things forgiven, I got an O as well! 

All in all, not a bad weekend, for all that, and many other reasons as well. 

(I still have an interesting story to tell, but today is not the day, and a few pieces have yet to fall into place to render it complete. )

Wednesday, May 19, 2021


We interrupt the string of kink-posts and frustration-feasts to feature a bit of an exasperated rant at another branch of wokeism.  Fondles recently published a post about a woman who dismisses the “not all men” argument. I would suggest a visit there to either watch the video or read the accompanying article/interview. Here is everything that is wrong with Evelyn's position:

“Pick me”. 1: while this may be true for some men who say this, it is equally or even MORE true for the men who fawn over her argument and thank her for enlightening them. By reading what CERTAIN women want to hear, guys are now saying exactly that. So in a different approach: “I agree with you that I shouldn’t say ‘not all men’ and I appreciate you telling me this… pick ME”, is STILL, "pick me."  2: In my own case, I raised two girls to be assertive, confident, professional women in a world where some men…..especially back when Michelle was a kid, could be a problem. So, was I empowering my daughter for this same ‘pick me’ motive? I did this because I wanted my daughter to ‘pick me’? Pick me for WHAT, over what? I thought I was preparing her to be her own person…...but I guess, as a guy, I am incapable of that?

Controlling women’s voices. I love arguments like these. “I say that you are all out to control me. If you agree, you admit to being out to control me. But if you disagree and tell me I’m wrong, you are trying to silence my voice because you are trying to control me.” Nowhere does this type of position allow for the fact that the person saying all this could ever be objectively wrong. Convenient.

Besides there are more fun ways to silence a woman than to keep telling them they're wrong.

Male superiority complex. This is hysterical if you take the same premise and apply it to ANY other situation. A “good samaritan” tries to help someone who they see as in need of protection because another person is clearly posing a threat and they feel they could be of help. How dare he! It is implying that the person can’t defend his or herself. He should let whatever happen happen I guess. But in her interview she says the problem is that men don’t actually do anything to help women but just brag about not causing them harm. But if they do act, according to her, aren’t they saying the woman can’t help herself? So which is it?  

Seems like no matter what we do, we men just keep getting it from both ends!

Cuts both ways: At one point she, using the knight/damsel analogy, denigrates men who act on women’s behalf as having other motives. (like pick me). But she is writing an article and making videos. Could she possibly be motivated to earn recognition? Is her thesis to be regarded as utterly altruistic in a world where motives are complex?  She also admits that anyone who grew up in our society has learned to live in it. Wow, that is earthshaking news, isn’t it? But she completely leaves out views. Aren’t there enlightened people and sexist people? Aren’t women, conditioned in the same society  just as likely to embrace sexism that they find appealing as a man (women Trump voters for example?) But is the implication then that by virtue of vagina, these women are inherently more supportive of trying to end gender bias than a male who actually believes in ending gender bias? Even if they seek legislation to thwart it? Sounds like SHE might be gender biased. 

The challenge. She says she challenges anyone to show they are without sexist bias. I accept her challenge. She stated earlier that men don’t defer to women. Poor gal. She is obviously hanging with the wrong people. I am FAR less likely to defer to a man than a woman, but that’s only because men are likely to be more aggressively ‘asshole-ish’. But there are women like this too, and they don’t get my deference either. (See? No sexism in my approach to assholes.)

Skepticism.  Her degrees keep being brought up as justification for her controversial position. Anyone with a degree or who knows people with degrees understand what nonsense such a criteria is. Her arguments fail the simplest of logical analysis, but I'm sure she paid her tuition and passed her tests and wrote her obligatory theses. (Also does it strike anyone else as funny that her serious dissertation on this subject is on TikTok and not in some professional journal?)  And it's not a 'her' thing or a degree thing. Shall I post a list of all the things said by people with degrees? LOL

Pragmatism versus “woke”. Though not stated specifically, articles like this are a woke-trend.  I would bet anyone from the past would look at our current woke environment with incredulity. Life can be a battle to get one’s way, whether that way is noble or selfish. To achieve anything big, one needs allies. In the past the motives of a potential ally were ALWAYS in question, and yet, people still knew they needed them, at least temporarily to achieve anything. What difference does it make to the progress of any “ism” whether the people fighting on your side are pure, altruistic, and in complete lockstep with you? What is the benefit to alienating potential allies as not being “woke enough” when there is still another side out there in flagrant opposition to you? 

There are men who DO want to keep women repressed, and others who don’t, but with articles like this, guys who are ostensibly on your side…….regardless of motive…..are being told that their penis renders them incapable of being a true ally. Better to seek the help of an Ann Coulter or Marjorie Taylor Greene, right? They have vaginas, so they MUST be on your side. LOL

Another implied argument is common to all woke tropes, be they about race, gender, or any defining feature that makes a person discriminated against, is the dismissal of empathy as offensive. In the past people shared stories of their situations to shed light on a plight. A sympathetic reader could see what was being said and perhaps relate a portion of it to something in their own experience so they could better understand, to the degree they could, what the other person was going through. Now? That’s sacrilege. 

“You’re not me and have no idea what it is to be me!” they scream. Well, ok, there is some truth to that, that we can all understand. But is it really a stretch for a person of an ethnicity that has been persecuted in some way to relate to the pain of the persecution of someone from a different ethnicity? Why are we working so hard to stop people from trying to relate to people different from themselves? Isn’t that the goal? Does a woke person think the best strategy for that is to alienate the potentially sympathetic party because they aren’t EXACTLY the same as them? If so, then “shut up!” Don’t tell me your story. Don’t bemoan your situation. If no matter what I attempt, I am still “not you” so therefore incapable of understanding….then leave me alone. But if you want my understanding and support, why not embrace my empathy? How do you fight the real enemy when you lump all the “non-you”s into the enemy/them camp?  Then EVERYONE is an enemy, and I suppose that is great to feel like a perpetually misunderstood victim.

Tuesday, May 18, 2021

And the 'Game' continues!

Due to being very busy yesterday, my morning tease while Rosa dressed was the only one for that day, BUT, today we are right back to the hourlies! One of the things I forgot to mention in my haste yesterday was that at one point last week, I took my massager outside to the shed in my yard so that I could do my teases on time in mid-project, while not trudging dirt into the bedroom every hour. 

The shed that has electric to power the massager is also more like a hybrid greenhouse with a lot of windows and big French doors. So 'doing it' in there added a little possibility of exposure (though VERY unlikely) to overly curious neighbors. The glare on the glass looking from outside is quite obscuring however and we do have privacy fencing too. Still teasing with bright sunshine all around, and a breeze blowing, did add a layer to my situation.

Teasing in the bright light of day.

Yes we have a sink in that shed, so no, this is not our bathroom! LOL

Today I will be doing some painting/staining outside on a kind of 'boardwalk' I constructed. So, 8:00 will likely be my last indoor edge for a while and I'll be back in that shed for the greater part of the day. I HAVE definitely noticed the time it takes to get to that precipitous "edge" has grown significantly shorter......though no less frustrating!

And as I said yesterday, there is quite a lot more going on as well! 

Monday, May 17, 2021

Like a leaky faucet


I have been reduced to a leaky faucet. I don't mean my age has finally rendered me incontinent (I'm hoping I have a few more years before THAT happens, at least). No, I mean that a little "game" Rosa and I have been playing recently has made me more like this:

Not me, but other than this guy's age and body hair color, that does look a like like mine......especially when it worked a bit better. LOL And the oozing is extremely accurate!

Last week on Thursday, after our mortgage signing on Wednesday, Rosa and I felt playful and initiated a game we've played before on days where she was working: hourly edges with no release. We started the day off before she began working with me kissing her feet while self-teasing, and ended the day with her teasing me as I revisited those sweet tootsies of hers. In-between, as I worked in the yard, on each new hour, I'd apply our massager just long enough to bring me to near ejaculation and then stop.  (That's a lot of teasing!)

OK, LOL, THIS time it IS me, not because I'm showing off, since I have nothing to brag about, but because the practice of using a single vibrator to edge (without all sorts of bondage and gear) simply can't be found in an image search! 

The effect on me was profound. I felt open and devoted and way more submissive. Rosa liked the effect so much that continuing this practice on Friday seemed a no-brainer. By midday Friday, I was going about my chores and activities literally with damp boxers! I would start a tease off just fine and get to that special point and stop. But a minute or so after stopping, I'd find "pre-cum" oozing from me in varying quantities. Multiply that by the hours in a day and you start to get the picture!

Rosa was amused by it all but also seemed willing enough to grant final "O" permission if I wanted it. The funny thing is, I wasn't getting cranky or irritable from the frustration, but more and more subby and compliant! We discussed it and speculated that maybe the attention made the difference? It seems if I'm O-less for a long time because we're busy or stressed or for some un-fun reason, I DO get cranky after a while. BUT if that same denial is intentional and sexy, and accentuates the frustration as something of a goal, then it seems that the longing becomes more sweet torture than real torture.

In the midst of all this other things were going on too, and I will write about them another time, but soon. However, I did have a few exchanges via text with my Monster, Ana over other things, but when she asked me about my day, I couldn't help but confess my situation, especially since she is well aware of my O-dependency on others and approves. She did indeed find my situation amusing and I mentioned something about wondering how long I should keep this going, and, given the context of what we HAD been discussing, Ana suggested Wednesday. Well, that seemed like a good a day as any and so Wednesday became the target date. (Thanks, Monster)

Saturday ended up a third day of teasing. And Sunday we were out, so the hourly teases weren't possible, but I did have one this morning while watching Rosa dress. ( a lot of leaking after THAT one!) LOL.   

So three days of hourly edges have left me in a profound state of subbiness and it managed to influence quite a few things going on around me. But like I said, another time for THAT. 

Friday, May 14, 2021

The Bureaucrat

Oh my, but there's a lot going on! The only problem is time is at a premium, but I will eventually share as much as I can. The other day Rosa and I signed our closing papers on a mortgage refinancing to take advantage of the current rates. The thing is it took an inordinately long amount of time to get from application to final approval, and none of it was based on anything REAL. In other words, the important aspects, the money, property value, income, etc. were all just dandy, but the bureaucrats in charge of the paperwork were not satisfied with anything other than  absurdly specific forms, many of which were not easily obtained. 

The experience is finally over and everything is good. SO good that it has resulted in a kind of 'sigh-of-relief' recharging of our kinky sides! But more on that to come. Today I will be posting a short story I wrote as a kind of personal therapy during the more bizarre moments in the process of getting our new mortgage. It is a kind of tongue-in-cheek observation of the inane nature of bureaucracy and those entrenched within that paper morass. I offered to share it with my loan officer, but he declined. Enjoy.

Heaven? Hell? All that matters is the Paperwork

The soul of a bureaucrat floats up to the Pearly Gates and seeks admission. St. Peter says, “you certainly qualify, but to get in, you need a ‘Trinity-3.0’ admission form. It says here in my book that you were something of a bureaucrat in your past life and so I’m sure you understand.”

“Well, of course! That makes perfect sense. Where can I get one?”

St. Peter responds, “I can give you one right here, but before I can do that, you’ll need a ‘Form 666’ from Satan, stating he has no claim or interest in you. You’ll need to stop off at Hell for that one, but it’s OK, they’re actually pretty efficient, but then I suppose they’d have to be to deal with the volume of entrants they process.”

So the bureaucrat goes down below to find Satan and a bunch of demons buried under stacks of paperwork. The devil, however, appears calm and in control. Though evil, he seems a  consummate professional and deftly pulls a ‘Form 666’ out from a cauldron and signs it, emancipating the person from any hellbound liability. “Here you go.”

The bureaucrat, impressed by the efficiency St. Peter had foretold, turns to leave when Satan interrupts. “Whoa, whoa, whoa. Where are you going so fast?”

The bureaucrat, waving his Form 666 responds, “why up to Heaven, of course.”

Satan rolls his eyes in exasperation. “That’s fine, but first you need to show me your copy of your Trinity-3.0 admission form. Otherwise how do we know you’re welcome up there?”

“But I can’t get the Trinity 3.0 without getting the Form 666 first. That’s why I’m here.”

“Hmmmm, that’s true,” the devil muses while stroking his beard. “But it’s equally true that you can’t leave here without the Trinity 3.0. It’s policy.” After some thought Satan speculates, ”I suppose you could apply for a ‘Special dispensation Tri-3 override’. I have a copy right here.” Satan rummages through another cauldron and pulls out a multi-page form the thickness of ‘War and Peace'

The bureaucrat stares in awe at its length and complexity and observes, “this is going to take forever!” Though a part of him is secretly comforted by the mindless rigidity of these afterlife regulations.

Satan snickers, “yes, I believe that’s the point,”  as he hands over a piece of sharpened charcoal to write with. “Now  don’t smudge it, or we can’t accept it and you’ll have to start over.”

“Don’t you have a pen?” the bureaucrat asks. “In heaven they had pens. St. Peter had a stack of them.” 

Satan laughs. “Well of course they have pens in heaven! They have EVERYTHING up there. But you’re down here, and things here are a little more ……..inconvenient. It’s kind of a theme we’ve got going……..but at least we are always open. Those guys,” the devil points up derisively, “close up shop every Sunday.” Then the devil recalls, “I do believe there is one pen around that some lawyer once snuck down here. There is a waiting list for it though. Let’s see, you’d be # 3,089,675,732. But when the others are done with it….and there’s any ink left, it’s yours.”

“Is there at least a place I can work on it with my charcoal? Somewhere with a flat surface?”

The devil points to a spot across from a little lava pool where a huge crowd is feverishly filling out  the same form, and says, “certainly. You can go over there with the other bureaucrats. Some of them have been at it a long time and are very familiar with that form.....though being what they are, I tend to doubt they’ll offer any help. In all eternity I can’t recall any of them ever helping anyone.” The devils leaned back in his office chair with his hands behind his horns. “You know, I used to send some demons over there every now and then to kind of mess with them while they were working, but after seeing how they constantly bicker with each other over the right or wrong way to complete the form, I realized they were doing a fine job of tormenting each other without any outside provocation. It’s saved me a lot on labor. Heck, I’ve even offered a few of the real sticklers a job tormenting the actual condemned souls here. They’re naturals at driving people crazy with technical minutia.”

As he slowly approaches his colleagues the bureaucrat turns and asks, “you said those souls are all fellow bureaucrats? Where are all the other people?”

“Oh, they’re either up there with feathered wings or somewhere down here roasting away, depending on the life they’ve led,” the devil replies matter-of-factly.

“But what about their forms?” the bureaucrat asks.

“Oh no. There are no forms for them. We just do what makes sense with each of them on a case-by-case basis. It’s one of the few things heaven and us agree on. No, the forms are just for you folks. We want you to feel at home.”

And with that, the bureaucrat realizes that maybe the devil is right. Maybe for a dedicated bureaucrat an eternity of filling out forms regardless of venue, is still a kind of heaven, and goes off to join the others no matter how long it takes. Of course for the rest of us souls, their fate didn’t seem heavenly or hellish…...just very, very fair and appropriate.


Thursday, May 13, 2021

4 Bosses (conclusion)

(ROSA, cont'd) While behavioral obedience can be complicated by circumstances, emotions, and even psychological baggage from the past, one area of obedience for me is much simpler......though not always easy: sexuality. I've already written about part of this in depth so I won't go into it all again, but within the context of Rosa as "Boss", the one area where there are NEVER any gray areas or points of contention is her complete and total authority over all of our relationship's sexuality. Not merely my orgasms, but nearly anything sexual. She can demand an O and get it without argument, she can tell me to wear something special to enhance a mood, and she can grant or deny me access to my own body as she deems fit. And for whatever reason, even when I would prefer something different, she gets her way. I can suggest, ask, seduce,......whatever......for her these are merely opportunities to act on or decline. 

One last area of expected obedience is simple doting! One perk of being the dominant partner is that not only do you get to call the shots, but you kind of have a built-in servant in your sub. Rosa gets pedicures on demand along with coffee, tea, or whatever else she needs from me. It's not totally fair that she might help if I ask her, and often does, but that she expects me to obey these directions from her whenever she issues them. And to be completely honest? I'm more than fine with that!

"Pop in a plug and make me a coffee."

So in more ways than one, she certainly is the person in my life who expects and receives the broadest aspects of my obedience.

ANA: Those familiar with this blog probably feel they know my Monster pretty well by now. She is by far the next person after her mother who gleans a pretty broad chunk of my obedience. This too I have written about before, but considering her age and relation to me, the genuine amount of influence she wields is astounding.

Having Ana as a "boss" is like getting reviewed by a much younger executive with very high standards and no hesitation in resorting to stern disciplinary action when needed. 

The impressive aspect of Ana's authority is the polite and even charming way she exerts her will. One would think that a young person with her power would be tempted to abuse it, and yet she never has! This is not to say she isn't often mischievous, but even these times are more of a mutual play-bonding between us than purely selfish whims. And anyone here also knows that Ana has no reluctance to make her feelings known about my behavior or anything I do to hurt her feelings, and also no reluctance to impose fairly severe punishments via "Discipline Slips" that are then acted upon by Rosa. 

As someone who grew up in our open DD household and who was apportioned varying degrees of her own authority from a fairly early age, Ana is fully aware of what 'discipline' means. She also talks to me openly about this lifestyle and reads this blog (when she has the time). When Ana is upset with me and writes out a 'slip', usually after we discuss and resolve the issue, and assigns a punishment spanking of hundreds or sometimes 1000 spanks, she isn't doing so naively. She knows EXACTLY what that means for me. She knows her mother will take any slip she issues seriously and spank me hard. If the number is very high, Ana knows this will mean a series of spankings, with each one becoming harder to take. And she wants me to experience that third spanking on a sore bottom because THAT is what she feels is appropriate and knows is utterly devoid of any enjoyment.

Letting her Mom do the honors doesn't take away from me knowing who that spanking is actually from.

Like her mother, she rarely extends her overall role into areas outside of my actual behavior. In other words she doesn't try to just generally order me around. The only other thing she is entitled to, is to "ask" for "treats" and the occasional doting as well. We both find this funny, because the treats are invariably little things like a special brand of snack chip, or some book she finds on one of our treks to Barnes & Noble and she asks for them in a solicitously polite way, while we both know her request is not going to be refused. ( A typical expression of this is a text I might get if she's going to be home about whether I'm going food shopping anytime soon, and if so would I please get her some _____? While this sounds downright simple and normal, her text is understood by us both to be more like: "make sure I have some _________ when I get back home." ) Recently she told me that she always liked this side of her authority (what kid wouldn't?) but felt very timid about using it.....initially. One of the things she likes about where we are now is the way she feels she grew into her ability to ask for things from me with far less trepidation. Even still, while she knows her little requests are really more like expectations, she never asks for anything extreme.

During one of our talks we discussed the day-to-day reality of our relationship and she, again just like her mother, sees nothing extraordinary about our situation. Instead she feels everything is just as it should be for who we all are, and that means that despite me having several decades on her, and despite our love for each other, that within the parameters of the areas described, Ana does expect my obedience as a given and sees no reason that our relative ages should be any kind of conflicting or mitigating factor. In her mind, she knows she is more than qualified to monitor my behavior, and while she may respect my age, experience, and knowledge in other regards, in this area, who she is as a person outweighs all of that, and she has a hefty discipline slip at the ready if my obedience falters.

NICKKI: Readers here also 'know' Nickki by now! Our growing tally of adventures has been well documented here in words and pictures. Like Ana, Nickki's authority is derived from an arrangement with Rosa and me, and made possible only through Rosa's consent. None of us would have it any other way. But within that overall condition comes a lot of latitude. And with Nickki this also means a direct 'hands-on' approach! 

Nickki needs only to have cause to contact me or Rosa and then secure Rosa's consent to have me report to her for discipline. This too took time. Nickki and I are friends first, and friends who care about each other tend to tread lightly with things that could become volatile. Punishing a friend for some transgression can be tricky, and it took a while for Nickki to wrap her head around it all. I too had to make some adjustments in how we interacted. As a result, we are simultaneously the same as we once were when we became friends, and different. And that difference could ultimately be reduced to the recurring theme here of obedience albeit select, specified obedience

The trick with us is navigating the weird waltz of buddies on somewhat equal terms, and two people committed to two very different, yet solid roles: she being a dominant, and me being submissive. For me it means, being me, but doing so....cautiously. There are no usual honorifics in play (except at those specific times when I am about to be punished) and there are no expectations of service, deference, or anything other than just doing our things together. The difference for her is that there is an underlying understanding that IF something goes awry, she has tangible recourse. 

It is within that recourse or within any time....even for 'fun'....that I find myself with a bare bottom facing her paddle, that I see myself being almost desperately obedient. Nickki likes to totally control a spanking, even for fun/payment/etc. and I admire that. And she does so with unwavering confidence and an expectation that even if I might not be obliged to obey her every whim at other times, in this situation, SHE is not to be trifled with. She will ask questions, and expect answers, she will want me to use certain terms, or present myself a certain way. If I am not in a position she likes, she barks a command of where she wants me.....and if I hesitate even the slightest, her hand is quick and merciless with the paddle. 

A past spanking that included a serious half and a 'fun' half. But while technically only "half serious" you can easily see that the end result to my butt was ALL serious!

So when I think of obedience with respect to my 'bosses', I see Rosa's authority as the most pervasive and Ana's close behind, but while Nickki's field of authority is a bit more limited, within that narrow scope, it is intense! Simply put, NO ONE can make me scramble to frantically appease than Nickki! She snaps and I obey!

MARTA: Marta is in a tough spot. On one hand, she seems more than willing to enjoy my deference, and even has shown an inclination to discipline if necessary. However, her husband, Wally, while tolerant of her role with us, doesn't really seem comfortable with it extending too far. As a result, Marta has kind of settled on a middle ground of sorts. She saves up her dominant energy for when she can be the "Village Disciplinarian" at our annual RenFaire, and concedes any other times to the competencies of her good buddy, Rosa. 

Marta a few years back, giving Nickki a few swats.

But Marta also sees my relationship with Rosa in contrasting couplets: she was a bit shocked by it, but then found it to be a great arrangement. She has reacted to my punishments with both an awed sense of "wow! She really gave it to you" and also a "but you got what was coming to you" kind of approval. And the one thing she definitely shares with Rosa, Ana, and Nickki, is the belief (which she has clearly expressed to me in the past) that I am right where I should be with regard to roles, accountability, and ......yes.....spankings that aren't 'fun' but real bun-burners meant to teach a lesson. And as someone included in the circle of 'ladies with authority, she too feels quite qualified and deserving of the honor. 

Marta really likes to tease me about my situation, and will use her given authority to make certain demands on me in a playfully bossy way. Perhaps because she is the least able to act on her authority directly, she seems more prone to messing with me verbally. She is definitely the most publicly (though playfully) bossy of the four. And there is no question that she gets a kick out of telling me something with a kind of emphatic "you heard me, right?" reminder that she has no problem with having Rosa deal with me if I don't obey her to her liking. 


Edited to add this perfect image suggested by CK:
Goya's "The Straw Mannequin"
(Or "KDP and His Four Bosses")

ROSA: Main Boss to whom all other bosses defer. My "Honey" who clearly wields the most influence over me and the person I try to obey most. Her authority encompasses behavior, my sexual outlets, and her own perk of being pampered on demand.

Natural dominant, reasonable 'boss', but capable of being strict and stern when needed. Spanks hard when she wants to, but can be playful as well.

My future wish/goal is something she and I just recently discussed which is a re-energizing of our arrangement with a bit of 'ramping up' my obedience and her punishments.....starting with one we discussed is long overdue.

ANA: Unquestioned "Second-in-Line". While she still needs her mother's approval for stuff with me, at this point it is practically a formality, since she is never overruled. Also someone whom I find myself obeying in a lot of ways.

Another natural dominant, but one for whom the more extreme expressions of this lifestyle are not a driving desire in her own life. Doesn't spank, but decrees them via a "Discipline Slip". Her punishments are known for their very high numbers, but she too can be very playful as well.

My future wish/goal with Ana is perhaps an exploration of how her "polite" requests can even further evolve into more direct commands.

NICKKI: A little more limited in her range of authority but very confident and intense within the areas she knows are hers. 

Yet another natural dominant, but one who needed some experience in order to see the difference between BDSM sensation play and DD, but  who now totally "gets it" and loves the power. A fireball of a spanker, blending scolds and spanks with an attitude that sends me scrambling to obey her every whim and yet still sends me home with a blazing butt!

My future wish/goal for Nickki is unfortunately something that isn't possible under our current agreed-upon conditions for our arrangement. I just found that the couple of times Nickki had me naked added a layer of embarrassment that was quite profound. Being a Lesbian, it wasn't a sexual thing, and that even added to my embarrassment because what was on display was doubly discounted: partly for being a male part, and second for not even being a great specimen of a male part .....which she would tease me about. So to be naked with someone who is not interested in what is being exposed, and even finds it something to be joked about, is very blush-inducing to someone who doesn't easily blush. But given how things are with us, I can easily live without this added twist. It's not a driving desire....just a potentially impactful add-on.

MARTA: An interesting paradox. Marta acts the least and yet, given her regard among us, has the potential to exert quite a bit of influence and authority. And since she kind of knows this, verbally messes with me routinely more than anyone else. Her raised eyebrow orders to me in front of everyone are her signature forms of dominant expression.

Still yet another natural dominant, but one for whom circumstance has limited her growth. She would almost certainly dominate her husband if he was into it, and she would definitely take a more active hand with me if he was more open to it. Her dominance is expressed mostly verbally, although she has, and could still, tell Rosa to punish me for whatever I do that upsets her. She seems to enjoy these kinds of threats more than acting upon them.....or is using them because she feels she CAN'T act on them personally. 

My future wish/goal couldn't be simpler: I wish she'd feel more comfortable telling Rosa to spank me for something, or hell......just doing it herself right then and there with the special wooden spoon I made her that she proudly keeps on display in her kitchen. I don't see this happening though due to the restrictive environment she's in. 

Wednesday, May 12, 2021

Having 4 'Bosses'

(Part 1) What is it like to have people in one's life, outside of a work environment, who have some degree of authority over you?  As someone in this situation, I'd like to explore the nuances and realities of just such a lifestyle. 

I should begin by clarifying that by most standards of submission, I'm probably not the most meek and unquestioning of submissives, BUT to the degree that I consent and trust to someone else's authority, I do honor that arrangement fairly faithfully. In my case, I count four people who have some level of "boss" power: naturally #1 is my wife, Rosa, the "head boss" to whom the other three defer for approval. #2 is unquestionably Ana, her daughter, who has more autonomy than the others and who is more apt to use her authority, though very responsibly.....or at times mischievously, but never abusively. #3 is Nickki who routinely seeks Rosa's "permission" or approval for whatever decisions she makes regarding me and my behavior. And finally there is #4, Marta, who technically has the same level of trust from Rosa and me as Nickki, but whose situation and perhaps personality, results in a much less overt display of authority.

My 4 bosses as portrayed by models in the glamorized version of my life. LOL

Before going into these ladies individually, let's discuss obedience. If one has a boss, the implication is that said boss has authority to give direction, and to hold their subordinate accountable. In a less formal and more domestic setting, this could simply be reduced to being obeyed. Now as I said earlier, I am not the most deferential submissive. Even with Rosa I don't consider my obedience absolute. Instead it's restricted to certain areas and is somewhat conditional. In other words, at my most compliant, I will still only obey directions in areas I've agreed to, and only when I trust the command is coming from a healthy place. (to be honest, though, with the people involved, this is rarely a problem) 

None of these people seek to order me about in things they know I'm more qualified to deal with. In fact, most will seek MY advice on many things. Therefore to just toss arbitrary commands at me merely to flaunt power, would be ridiculous. And as such, all of these ladies are quite content to rule over their select kingdoms......and in those kingdoms I am an obedient vassal. Now let's look at those realms and rulers.

My Rosa pointing to some amusingly appropriate graffiti. Despite the sentiment, the "everything" is not as accurate in real life as it might be for some.  But we do joke along these lines since she often gets her way even in areas where her authority is not absolute.

ROSA: Clearly my wife, lover, & friend first and foremost, but also someone with a personality and temperament suited to help guide me through my weak spots. I am not lazy, I don't shirk chores, I have little issue with overindulgence and am very responsible about adhering to healthy decisions without needing outside help. I am also knowledgeable and know how to get stuff done. So, what does Rosa help with? My moods! I can get hyper, impatient, cranky, snarky, and even defeatist at times. The latter issue Rosa combats with reassurance. But the others, she combats with her paddle. 

The look that means business! Rosa certainly loves me, but she is no softy when it comes to discipline. If I deserve it, she will roast my hinder with guiltless determination. And to her, that's nothing exceptional....just the natural order of things. 

So what about actual obedience? For us this doesn't mean Rosa will tell me every little thing to do. She won't use her role to determine important issues best made jointly. But she WILL say something like: "Okay, now tonight I want you to be nice with __________ and not start an argument over something silly. I want to have fun because I've been stressed all week, so just keep the conversation light" before we visit some friend or have someone over. ( She has, though not frequently, spanked me pre-emptively in similar situations just as a kind of tangible exclamation point to her command.) And in this realm I know she is usually right and I defer to her authority. I obey. 

She will also point out where I said something upsetting, or treated her or someone else callously or impatiently. Again, for me, being aware of my predisposition to this fault, I rarely protest and when she says, "I don't like how you __________, come with me!" I obey. I said in the caption....despite her 'limited' authority, she gets her way in many other things.... A LOT even if it's not overt obedience! 

A picture I've used before of a situation that is fairly definitive of our relationship and what the expectation for obedience is and what the consequences for disobedience end up being: me over Rosa's lap on our bed after a punishment spanking. 

(to be continued)

Monday, May 10, 2021


When it comes to spanking, I have to say that I've been lucky enough to have experienced quite a bit of variety..........though I certainly haven't done everything. One missing twist on the permutations of discipline has been getting spanked along with someone else. 

I will admit, however, that while it would be an interesting experience, any interest on my part is more novelty-driven......or perhaps even completionist. It is not a real desire though. If it was, I probably would have figured out a way by now to have made it happen. 

Being punished alongside someone else was one of my earliest fantasies, as I described in the past with my half-fantasy/half play-acting on my bed as a boy of 11 or so. But that fantasy involved a partner with whom I was romantically interested and I simply don't see the appeal in that anymore. 

I also don't think I'd be eager to be punished along with another guy. I mean, I would, but it wouldn't mean anything past the chance to try something new.  The ideal comrade for a joint punishment would, without doubt, be a submissive Lesbian female! And in my ancient past, there was even a contender with whom something like this came VERY close to happening.........but that was a long time ago and those folks are long gone from my circle. 

Now, however, I can't think of any candidates. Sure, Nickki is kind of submissive to Jean, but (and this is a BIG "but") Nickki is also my part-time Top! Getting smacked alongside her would just feel weird. I prefer to keep her a bit more elevated in my mind; a 'boss', not a fellow subordinate.

I could see myself enjoying sharing the disciplinary stage with a submissive female in a heterosexual D/s arrangement, but again, no one we know (at this time, anyway) fits that description. 

It strikes me as interesting that this notion is quite prevalent in the commercial "spank photo/video" world. You can easily find hundreds of shots of this shared punishment idea displaying every gender combination and discipline situation imaginable. For the sake of today's post though, rather than illustrate it with variety, I am going to present a single sequence from an older "Realspankings" video featuring my faves, Kailee & Lily (her real life sister).

Lily (the blonde) and her younger sister, Kailee Robinson

In this video "Ms. Burns" (a popular spanker and spankee in her own right) does the disciplinary honors. 

While this sequence has its charm, it does not even come CLOSE to the interactions between these two that I TRULY love: Kailee the younger sister spanking her older sibling Lily! Age reversal spanking is FAR more appealing to me than joint suffering, and yet? While there are images of it out there, it is far less prevalent than joint spankings. And that is a shame. 

Friday, May 7, 2021

More on O-Control

Thursday provided an interesting opportunity to revisit the topic of chastity that I covered pretty extensively back in December. The one absent voice on the subject back then was Ana, and due to an early morning event that prompted me thinking of the issue, and the fact that she and I later got to spend quite a bit of time together driving to a seaside National Park and then biking the trail there, we finally had that discussion. 

That morning Rosa and I had both gotten up early and I noticed that as she was checking her phone she was kind of rubbing my leg with her foot. Not one to ignore a hint, I spun around and began kissing those gorgeous toes of hers. 

Now it’s been a while since my last O and I was thinking it would be nice to get some attention….even if it was just a bit of teasing, so I made some gestural hints and when those were ignored, a more direct attempt at taking her hand and directing it to the part of me that was longing for some stimulation. She just said that she had to start work soon but in the next breath asked that I give her an O. I playfully scolded her for saying she had no time to tease me but she felt there was enough time for me to treat her to an orgasm. She accused me of being difficult and seeing the playful dominance she was projecting, relented and obliged. When she was done, she said, “OK I have to work now.” And there I remained still frustrated.

Ah to be mischievously dismissed! Such a power trip for the lady in charge!

This highlighted the reality of living as I do. Having an O or even just getting attention is never a given, but the expectation to deliver one is. Such is a sub’s life! LOL.

Anyway this certainly got me thinking about my chastity lifestyle and it reminded me that I never got Ana’s take on it since she was ridiculously busy at the time. Thursday provided a perfect opportunity to discuss it…...and we did.

To be somewhat complete AND concise, here are the main takeaways from our talk:

-Ana began by making it clear that she herself would NEVER submit to such regulation. I told her that given her dominant personality that just made sense and I would never expect her to be controlled this way.

-But she very quickly followed up by adding that if we just look at our relative personalities and even our roles with each other, she feels such control is not a bad or even strange thing for me or even other submissive types who genuinely benefit from such control.

-She added that as a dominant personality she can relate to being in control of something like this and feels such control is appealing and that she even can see how her decisions for something like this would be very similar to how she views being dominant in a behavioral/punishment situation.  Basically she was saying that while she would never be controlled this way, she’d certainly have no problem with HAVING such control, and that she would be good at it and be very discerning in her decision-making. (She sounded like her mother! LOL)

-I admitted that many motives and factors can influence such authority and that circumstances can make the decision process range from beneficial, to practical, to whimsical, and all the way to mischievous torment. (again, very much how Rosa sees it.) Ana completely agreed, saying that those would be the things she would consider when making such a decision for someone else, and admitted that while practical and loving regulation is sort of the default mode for this,( in order to ensure and maintain the trust of the submissive party) if the people involved were of a certain mindset, then even using tease and denial as pure playful torture was an equally valid choice. She readily admitted to enjoying my suffering at times when I confessed being in a particularly tormented state of frustration after being subjected to 'tease & denial'. Texts revealing such a state for me that coincided with times she herself felt she was suffering through some exam or project at school were particularly appealing for her.

-And lastly, we discussed MY motives for doing this and again she made it clear that despite any occasional doubts that I might have on having relinquished this personal form of gratification to the authority of another, it really is a good thing for me to have trusted others, and now her mother, to have final say in what I get or don’t get. 

One thing that I revealed in the process of having this discussion was that while I have given this authority to several others over the course of my lifetime, it was never as simple as thinking: ‘you’re the Top so you are definitely qualified to have this authority’. Instead my choices have been selective and rooted in a feeling that the person I was entrusting, WAS a talented decision-maker and not just nimble with a paddle. I realized that if someone was dominant but I found their powers of discernment lacking, I might play with them in some ways, but I would not hand over this power to them. Ana said that made sense and fell in line with what she was saying about having to be good at this and having a clear purpose and vision in being the administrator of someone else’s sexual activity. 

It was a good talk, and...........ironically........... much later, Rosa, after some persistent near-begging from me, treated me to a much-needed O. 

Tuesday, May 4, 2021

Busy time

It's that time of year where I just have a lot to do. Today I will be cleaning my larger pond. Yesterday I babysat. And over the weekend we entertained to some degree Friday, Saturday, and Sunday.  (Hooray for vaccinated people!) In short:

My Monster, Ana is home for a week. We have plans to go biking on Thursday.

I finished that nasty garden project and feel very good about the achievement.

The painting I did for my grandson is now hanging over his crib. His birthday is approaching rapidly!

Made some more new drinks but since drink recipes seem to be as popular as an anti-vaxxer at a party thrown by normal people, I probably won't bother posting them. 

On a TTWD-note, I asked for an O from Rosa this past weekend but got turned down. I'm feeling the need and it's making me a bit more subby-minded than usual. We also discussed playing with the pegging machine sometime soon. Rosa seems amused and willing. 

If you're a regular used to comments from me on your own blogs, please know I haven't had much time lately. I will get back into it soon I hope. 

And that's about it for now. I've posted shots of my arbor/deck before, but here is one from this weekend from the perspective of sitting at the table under it and looking out: